


Silence is a Strange Sound

by Otter_Love_ASL



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: American Sign Language, Deaf Jay, F/M, Family, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:53:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26242213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Otter_Love_ASL/pseuds/Otter_Love_ASL
Summary: An on the job accident changes Jay's life. With the help of his brother and team, will he be able to adjust? Most of the first chapter is taken from Chapter 4: D is for Deaf of "A to Z Jay Halstead Whump". There are some changes to hopefully be more accurate to Jay's specific situation.Will update of the first of the month.Here’s a link to a Twitter thread for some visuals (YouTube, website videos, website links, and pictures): https://twitter.com/otter_love_asl/status/1365005425993781250?s=21
Relationships: Jay Halstead & Hailey Upton, Jay Halstead & Will Halstead, Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton
Comments: 14
Kudos: 65





	1. Cause & Effect

**Author's Note:**

> Coincidently, September is Deaf Awareness month.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of Jay's normal and a new life.

Key:

_Text message_

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

For the past week, the intelligence unit has been working on a pedophile-trafficking ring whose victims were young girls between fourteen and seventeen. As always, cases involving kids seem to touch the unit differently than their other cases. For Kevin, he can imagine if it were his sister; Adam and Kim both think about their unborn child that they lost; Vanessa knows this could have been her while she spent some time squatting in abandoned houses as a teen; Hailey can see herself in these girls, just wanting someone to pay attention to her in her youth; as for Jay, he is wired through the heart, he wants to be able to rescue everyone.

"What do we have?" Voight asks.

"I just put a BOLO out on a white SUV," Jay informs the team as he walks back into the room.

"The driver has a rap sheet a mile long," Hailey adds. "Started as a juvenile with petty theft and some other misdemeanors- escalated to more serious crimes by the time he was nineteen."

Voight nods, "Jay, Hailey. Take another crack at the neighbors," he orders his two detectives.

* * *

"Talk to me, Jay. What's going through that head of yours?" Hailey asks as they are driving back to the district after talking to the neighbors with no luck.

Before he can answer their radios crackle to life, "5021 units. There has been a sighting of your BOLO in the industrial warehouses in Englewood."

"5021 George, copy," Jay speaks into the radio before turning the truck around. They race to the warehouse in silence.

Hailey and Jay get to the warehouse first, "Look, it's abandoned," Hailey comments.

Jay picks up his radio while still keeping an eye on their suspect, "Guys, where are you?" Jay asks the rest of his team.

"Rojas and I are ten minutes out," Adam tells Jay.

"Kim and I are twelve minutes," Kevin calls.

"Ten minutes," Voight's voice comes across. "Sit tight and wait for back up."

Jay looks up to see their suspect entering the warehouse. Ignoring his sergeant's orders, he gets out of his truck.

"Jay! What are you doing? Wait for back up! The team is ten minutes out!" Hailey yells at her partner as he runs towards the abandoned warehouse.

"We don't have ten minutes! We don't even have five! If we wait, we might lose the girls!" Jay yells back, not caring if his partner doesn't follow him.

Hailey looks back, hoping to miraculously see the rest of the team arriving, but is met with nothing. She makes the decision to follow Jay, not able to let him go without some backup.

She catches him just before he kicks in the door to the backroom of the building. The two carefully clear the room, until Jay hears something.

The sound so quiet, Jay wouldn't have heard it if not for his years as a Ranger. Knowing exactly what that sound was, Jay frantically looks for his partner, "Hailey! Bomb, run!" he yells running towards her to ger her out of harm's way.

Jay grabs her, but can't get out of the room before the device goes off. Jay grabs Hailey, throwing himself on top of her, in a last-ditch effort to protect her.

The device goes off, sending the two detectives flying from the force. Hailey is protected by Jay, but he knocks his head against a concrete support pole, getting knocked out in the process.

Not knowing what is in the bomb or if there are more, Hailey is cautious not wanting to put herself and Jay in any more danger. When the room stops shaking from the force of the explosive, Hailey takes a chance to look around.

Her first concern is her unconscious partner. Looking at him, she notes that the only visible damage is where his head is bleeding. She puts her fingers to his neck to find a strong, steady pulse and sees his chest rise and fall, reassuring her that he is breathing. She looks around the room and makes note that it looks like the bomb was for structural damage: several support beams are out and their exit is blocked by debris.

Hailey could climb over the debris to get out, but that would mean leaving Jay by himself while she called for help. Hailey decides to stay with her partner, listening to her heart and not her head. Hailey knows that she can't lift her partner while he's unconscious, and even if she could, she'd be worried about spinal damage.

So, she waits for her team to arrive, knowing they can't be too far away.

* * *

After waiting for what seems like forever, Hailey hears the voices of her team. "Jay! Hailey!"

"In here!" She calls back.

"Hailey is Jay with you?!" She recognizes Adam's voice.

"Yeah! He needs help! He's unconscious! Head injury, possible spinal injury!" She calls out wanting her partner to get help as soon as possible.

Hailey hears his response and him calling for someone to call for an ambulance, but her only focus is on Jay, watching to make sure he's still breathing.

So focused on her partner, Hailey doesn't realize when Adam enters the room until he is right next to her. "Are you alright?" He asks, taking in both of their appearances.

"I'm fine. Jay took the brunt of it. I don't think the bomb was meant to take life, it looks like it was meant for structural damage," Hailey informs him of her observation.

Before Adam can respond, Brett and Foster of Firehouse 51 are being escorted in by Severide and Cruz. The paramedics get to work on the unconscious detective, putting a c-collar around his neck before placing him on a backboard. Brett then puts in an IV line; Hailey knows Jay would hate both the needle and the collar if he were awake.

"What about you? Are you okay?" Brett asks Hailey as Severide, Cruz, and Adam are getting Jay into the Stokes basket.

"I'm fine, Jay protected me," Hailey answers. "How did you get here so fast?"

"We got a call from a bystander. Said that a building collapsed after three people ran inside. We just didn't know it was you guys until dispatch made a second call that it was two police inside and we saw Voight and the rest of your team outside."

The six of them carefully make their way out of the room while making sure they get Jay out with as little problems as possible.

Once they get out of the warehouse with all the rubble, they are able to move him to the stretcher.

"I'm going with him," Hailey tells Voight as she is halfway into the back of the ambulance, not giving him a choice about letting her go. A feeling of déjà vu as she climbs in, the last time he was unconscious in the back of an ambulance because his big heart got him shot. This time he was once again hurt because he was trying to help someone.

* * *

Arriving at Med, Hailey is pushed away as Marcel and Choi get Jay into a trauma room to treat him. Watching helplessly, Hailey can only hope that he will be okay.

Hailey doesn't realize that Natalie has been trying to get her attention until she feels a hand on her shoulder. "Hailey, he's in the best hands possible," she tells her as she leads the detective to the doctors' lounge where a distraught Will is trying to get past Maggie to be with his brother.

When he sees Hailey he has to ask, "What happened?"

"I don't know. We cleared the room, then he yelled about a bomb. He threw himself on top of me. It knocked him into a support beam and knocked him out."

Before Will can formulate an answer, April appears in the doorway, "They're taking him to CT to see if there is a bleed."

"I should find the others, they'll want to know," Hailey speaks out loud before making her way out to the waiting room.

When the rest of the intelligence team sees her, they all ask different variations of how is he doing.

"They took him to CT. That's all I know."

The team waits, none able to hide their nerves, all taking their turn either sitting or pacing. After almost an hour of waiting, Will walks in to give them an update. "The good news is that there is no spinal damage or brain bleed," Will tells them when he has the team's attention. "He does have a minor skull fracture so he's going to be put in the ICU so we can monitor that. If there are no complications, he can go home in a week."

"What kind of complications?" Hailey asks.

"Partial or complete blindness, deafness, there could be brain damage. It could be temporary or permanent. The brain is a complicated thing, and with previous head trauma, the most recent being less than nine months ago, we're being cautious. This is Jay, he's going to be fine."

"Can we see him?" Voight asks.

"Make it short. I don't want to overwhelm him," Will answers, knowing they will find a way to see him either way.

Will leads them to his ICU room and they go in two at a time. Hailey goes in last, with the mind-set of not leaving until she can see for herself that Jay is going to be okay.

After seeing Jay, the rest of the team goes back to the district knowing that he will be okay and wanting to be able to tell him that they got the guy who was trafficking the girls when he wakes up. Hailey remains in the seat next to his bed.

Hailey talks to him about whatever she can think of, hoping he can hear her. Unbeknownst to her and everyone else what his future hold.

* * *

Finally, around six o'clock, a full five hours after being rescued from the warehouse, Jay opens his eyes. It is slow, but Hailey can see his blue-green eyes. "Hey, welcome back," she whispers.

Jay's brows furrow in confusion. He can see Hailey's lips moving, but no sound is coming out. Now that he thinks about it, he can't hear the annoying beeping of every machine that is normally on in a hospital.

"Jay, what's wrong?" Hailey asks when she realizes that the heart monitor attached to him is going crazy.

Jay is looking around the room like a wild animal that is trapped. Hailey takes her hand and gently forces Jay's face to look at her. "What's wrong?" She repeats.

Jay still can't hear his partner. Wide-eyed, Jay stumbles, "I-I can't…" Jay can feel the vibration in his throat making the sounds, but he still can't hear.

"You can't what?" Her lips are moving, but still no sound.

"I can't hear."

This worries Hailey, but she tries to not let it show. Hailey nods, pointing to the call button, letting him know she was going to call for help. "He's awake, but there is a bit of a problem," she speaks into it when a nurse answers.

A couple of minutes later, a nurse, doctor, and Will walk into the room. "He can't hear anything," Hailey informs them.

Will immediately goes to his brother, placing a hand on his shoulder in support.

"We're going to run some tests, but this could be a complication of the head injury," the doctor tells them. He then finds a piece of paper to write down what he just said to let Jay know. Jay reads the note before looking to Will overwhelmed. Will nods his head and Jay agrees, trusting his brother wouldn't agree to anything that would hurt him.

Jay is taken for the tests, leaving Will and Hailey in his room. Hailey looks to the red-head, "What chance does he have at getting his hearing back?"

"Hailey, I'm not an audiologist," Will tells her, trying to avoid the question.

"Will," Hailey stresses. "I need to know; I just want to help him."

"Hearing is a funny thing, sometimes a person can regain their hearing. But if this is a complication of the head injury- it's most likely permanent."

"So, he can forget about his career as a detective," Hailey thinks out loud.

"In all likelihood, yes," Will speaks.

"What do I do? How do I convince him that there's more to life than being a police officer?" Hailey asks.

"We figure it out as we go," Will tells her, not having another answer.

* * *

Jay is brought back to his room an hour and a half later. "The doctor will be in in a bit to talk about the results."

Hailey places a hand on Jay's forearm, silently showing her support for him.

Before anyone can say anything, a doctor walks in. Looking to see that Jay is not alone, he takes the dry-erase board that he brought with him and writes something before handing it to Jay. Reading the board, Jay nods his head. "I was just asking if it was okay with him for you guys to know what happening," he tells the two.

"So, what's causing his hearing loss?" Will asks.

"The skull fracture caused swelling to his temporal lobe. This is where your primary auditory cortex is; this cortex is responsible for interpreting sounds and language that we hear," the doctor explains.

"Is there anything that can be done?" Hailey asks.

"Not much, we'll let the swelling go down and see if that helps. In the meantime, I'm going to connect him with an audiologist."

"Is there a chance that his hearing can return on its own?"

"The audiologist can answer better than me, but it's going to depend on if the swelling caused permanent damage." He waits and gives that a minute for the two to sink in. "The audiologist will be in within the next hour or so."

The doctor then takes the whiteboard and writes a condensed version of the verdict for Jay. _The skull fracture you sustained caused swelling to the part of your brain that processes sounds and language. An audiologist will be in within the next hour or so. Do you have any questions?_

"Permanent?" Jay asks.

The doctor takes the board to write his answer again. _Possibly, we have to see what the damage is once the swelling goes down._

Jay nods, looking to his brother. "Thanks, Doc. I think Jay needs time to process this," Will speaks for his brother.

The doctor leaves, leaving the three alone in the ICU room.

Hailey moves so she is sitting on the edge of his bed. She makes sure Jay is looking at her before she tells him, "Everything will be okay," making sure to enunciate each word.

* * *

Almost an hour later a lady walks into Jay's room. "Hi, my name is Dr. Carter. I'm an audiologist, is now a good time?"

"Yeah," Will answers while Hailey grabs Jay's attention.

Dr. Carter places her laptop on Jay's tray facing him. She then takes a seat on a stool and sits a wireless keyboard on her lap. She types as she speaks, "My name is Dr. Carter and I'm an audiologist here. Do you go by Jacob?"

"Jay," the detective tells her.

"Okay, Jay. Who is with you?"

"My brother and partner from work."

"Okay. Is it okay if we talk about what's going to happen with them here?" Jay nods. "Okay. So, from the notes, you were told what caused your hearing loss."

"Yes."

"Do you have any questions or do you want to talk about what this means moving forward?"

"No questions right now," Jay answers looking to Hailey and Will. The two agree with him.

"Okay. So, right now we aren't going to do much. The priority is the skull fracture, in a couple of days if your doctor is okay with it, we are going to take you for a test to see how much of your hearing was affected-"

"I can't hear anything," Jay interrupts.

"Hearing is measured by decibels, so by seeing what you can and cannot hear will tell us the severity of your hearing loss. Hearing loss is broken into five levels of classification: mild hearing loss, moderate hearing loss, moderately severe hearing loss, severe hearing loss, and profound hearing loss. By understanding where your hearing loss is, we can decide what course of action to take."

"What do you mean by course of action?" Hailey asks.

"I mean, what path is Jay going to take for communication and if he will benefit from hearing aids. If so, we will make molds of your ears and get you set up with them.

"What did you mean by the type of communication?" Will asks.

"And how much will hearing aids help him?" Hailey asks.

"It will depend on where he falls in the classification of hearing loss. It could be anywhere from being very beneficial to only having him hear ambient sound. There are different ways that he can communicate. Some people chose to rely on writing down their conversations and now with technology it has gotten easier. There is also lip-reading and communicating verbally, though even the best lip-readers only catch about thirty-three percent of what is said. A lot of it is filling in the blanks on the context of what the conversation is. Cued speech is another option as well as learning sign language."

"What's cued speech?" Jay asks.

"It's a method of communication where the mouth movements of speech are combined with a system of hand movements. The sounds have a handshape and place around the mouth."

"This is a lot," Jay states.

"It's okay to be overwhelmed. This is a big change in your life, a fast change. I'm going to leave you some pamphlets on cued speech and American Sign Language as well as information on the different types of hearing aids. If you have any questions, just have someone page me and if not, I will see you when we do the hearing test."

"What about cochlear implants?" Will asks.

"I don't recommend that. Any residual hearing he has will be taken from implants. They're also not a cure, they rewire the brain to hear electronically. I would honestly look into another career path," she tells them with a sad smile.

She makes sure the three of them don't have any more questions before leaving the room.

When she leaves, Jay looks to his brother and partner, as if asking what they think he should do.

Hailey takes the whiteboard that the first doctor left, _Read the pamphlets and whatever you decide, Will and I will support._

Jay looks at them after reading her message and nods.

* * *

Two days later Jay is deemed stable enough to move for the hearing test. The three of them make the trip to the audiology department, where the hearing test will take place.

Before performing the hearing test on Jay, Dr. Carter asks, "Have there been any changes in your hearing?" Using the same method of communication for Jay as their first meeting.

"I can kind of hear them. I hear the voice, but I can't tell what they're saying though, the words are vague- kinda like they are whispering or underwater," Jay answers.

"Okay, that's good," Dr. Carter encourages.

"He had another CT this morning," Will tells the audiologist. "The swelling is gone, apparently it was minimal when he was brought in."

"Good to know. I'll put that in my notes," she tells the older brother before preforming the test on Jay.

Jay is put in a different room while Hailey and Will are in the room with Dr. Carter.

Jay was given a set of headphones and was told to raise his right hand when he heard a sound from the right side of the headset and the same for his left. After fifteen minutes, Jay raised his left hand twice, and his right hand once. They spend another ten minutes having Jay listen to words said through the headsets and repeating them.

When Jay walks into the room with the others, frustration is clear on his face. "That was so bad."

Hailey rests her hand on his arm giving a silent reassurance.

Dr. Carter is focused on her monitors for a moment before turning her attention to the three of them. "So, it looks like your hearing loss is bilateral sensorineural hearing loss and you're ranging between severe and profound," she tells them.

"Bilateral sensorineural hearing loss?" Hailey asks, hand still on his arm.

"And what does that mean for him?" Will asks.

"It means the hearing loss is in both ears. Sensorineural hearing loss is when damage happens in the inner ear, either to the hair-like cells or the auditory nerve. From what I understand, in your case, it is most likely a combination of the loud noise from the explosion combined with the head trauma when you were knocked against the support pole. A hearing aid would help some, but you would still be relying on lip-reading or other forms of communication."

"Okay," Jay states. "What should I do?" he asks his brother.

"It's up to you."

"I feel isolated right now, I don't want to feel like that," Jay tells Dr. Carter.

"Okay, in your case, hearing aids would help with ambient noise, but not as much as voices. Is that something you would like to pursue?"

"Yes."

"Okay, we can do the molds now if you want."

"Okay.

Dr. Carter gets what she needs to do the moldings. She places the cotton stopper in Jay's right ear before kneading the molding material and putting it in the syringe. "This will feel a little weird," she warns. She then repeats the same process for the left ear.

The moldings sit in his ears for five minutes while they harden.

"That feels weird," Jay comments when she takes them out.

"With your degree of hearing loss, you can either do Behind-The-Ear, BTE, or In-The-Ear, ITE. Both are pretty similar in function, because of their size both will pick up more wind noise than other models, but they are the only options with your degree of hearing loss. ITEs can get clogged with earwax," she informs him.

"Behind-The-Ear?" Jay answers though it sounds more like a question. Will nods encouragingly to his brother.

"Okay, what about color?"

"Color?" Jay questions confused.

"You can pick the color of your hearing aids. Some people pick something close to their hair or skin color if they want them to be less noticeable. Some choose a bold or metallic color if they are worried about losing them."

Jay looks to Will for help. Will looks to Dr. Carter, "Do you have any samples that we can use?"

"Yes, here," she hands Will some sample models that are both skin and hair tones.

Will takes them and puts them behind Jay's ear. When he finds the closest to Jay's skin color and hair color, he has Hailey take a picture so Jay can see.

"What do you think?" Hailey asks, making sure that Jay can see what she is saying.

Jay points to the darker one that is closer to his hair.

"And what about the molding? Do you want clear or beige?"

"What is less noticeable?"

"Clear."

"Okay."

"Okay, so chocolate hearing aids and clear molding," she notes as she fills out the paperwork. "It's going to take one to two weeks for them to come in. When they do, I'll contact you to come in and do the programming."

After getting the information from Dr. Carter, they take Jay back to his room.

"What do I do about work?" Jay asks the question that has been plaguing him.

 _You tell Voight and Hailey and I will be with you every step_ , Will writes knowing his brother has a long road ahead of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, this is definitely longer than what I'm used to writing so, I'm probably going to try to update on the first of the month. This story is going to follow his transition to the Deaf World. This is an Upstead story, just not in the first few chapters. Because this is about Deaf Culture and the Deaf Community, the description of the Signs used are going to be described in detail the first few times they are used. I will write to the best of my abilities of how Deaf people act (Ex: it is totally normal to walk in between two people signing and it is not considered rude). If there is anything that you would like to see, let me know and I will see what I can do.


	2. American Sign Language

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay and Hailey dive into his new method of communication.

Key:

_Text_

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

Hailey walks into Jay's hospital room the next day to see him looking over the pamphlets that Dr. Carter left the first day. Hailey flicks the light switch a couple of times to get his attention, not wanting to startle him like she did the previous day.

He looks up, "Hey."

Hailey smiles, not saying anything until she has the whiteboard in her hand, _Hey, what are you looking at?_ She asks, hoping that he is going to let her in.

Jay reads the board. "Just trying to figure out if I should go with signing or cued speech."

_What do you think?_

"Cued speech looks easier to learn but it's not as common. Sign would be learning a whole new language. But it's also better known and there's more of a chance that that is what someone would know if I had to communicate with them."

_Are you willing to learn a new language?_

"Will the people in my life be willing to?"

_Will and I will support whichever one you chose. As for the team, it's not up to them. Do what you feel most comfortable doing._

"Do you think I can learn Sign?" Jay asks.

 _I think you're too stubborn not to once you put your mind to it_ , Hailey smiles as she writes her comment.

"So, now that that is figured out, can you spring me?" Jay asks hopefully.

Hailey gives him a look before replying, _No. You need to take it easy with your head._

"I would rest better at home."

_Nice try. Do you want me to see if Will can bring you something to change into? T-shirt and sweats? So you can ditch the hospital gown._

"Yes," Jay answers before he finishes reading the question. "What's happening with the case?"

_We're back to square one. The rest of the team will visit when we get them. They want to be able to tell you that it's over when they see you._

"Do they know?"

_No. I figured you wanted to be the one to tell them._

"Thanks."

Hailey nods then grabs her phone to text Will. She gets an immediate reply. _Will said he would bring you a change of clothes later. In the meantime, I brought my computer- do you want to look up some signs._

Jay nods, prompting Hailey to type in 'Beginners ASL'. Hailey takes a moment to look at the results before turning to Jay. _It has its own alphabet. Do you want to work on that first?_

"Okay," Jay answers, moving over so Hailey can sit next to him where they can both see the computer. She takes the hint and sits next to him– computer on her lap.

The two spend the next hour and a half going over the alphabet. The letters are not as hard as they think.

The letter _A_ is like a fist, only the four fingers are flat against the palm, not curved in with the nails touching the palm and the thumb is sticking up. _B_ is the four fingers pressed against each other straight up with the thumb bent across the palm. _C_ is probably one of the easiest, just bending their fingers and thumb to the shape of a _C_. The letter _D_ is the middle, ring and pinkie fingers curved over the palm with the thumb touching the tip of the middle figure and the index finger standing straight up. _E_ is similar to _A_ , but the four fingers are curved in, nails touching the palm; the thumb is also bent in, the top touching the fingers. The letter _F_ is like the 'okay' hand signal, but the middle, ring and pinkie fingers touching each other leaving no gaps. _G_ is a little different, instead of the back of their hand facing themselves, it is facing to the person they would be signing to. Placing the middle, ring and pinkie fingers like the letter _A_ , the index finger and thumb straight out, parallel to each other, the hand at the same degree as if playing _rock, paper, scissors_.

 _H_ is almost identical to _G_ , the only difference is that the thumb is now bent, touching the ring finger and the middle finger is now straight out underneath the index finger, touching each other, leaving no space between. _I_ is the pinkie finger standing up by itself, the other fingers curled to the palm with the thumb resting across them. _J_ is the same placement as _I_ , but the movement is to draw a _J_ in the air. The letter _K_ is the ring and pinkie fingers down towards the palm, the index figure standing straight up with the middle finger straight out at a forty-five degree angle and the thumb touching the base on the side of the middle finger underneath the index finger. _L_ is just making an _L_ out of the index finger and thumb. _M_ is the four fingers in the same position as an _A_ ; then the thumb goes underneath the first three sticking out between the ring and pinkie finger. _N_ is the same as _M_ , the only difference is the thumb is sticking out between the middle and ring fingers. _O_ is literally making an _O_ with your hand, thumb touching the middle and index fingers. _P_ is the same as _K_ , only angled down, so that the middle finger is pointed to the floor.

 _Q_ is the same shape as _G_ but the placement is like most others where the hand is straight forward and has the same angle as _P_. The letter _R_ is like crossing your fingers, the middle finger behind the index finger. _S_ is like the letter _E_ , but the thumb is across the other fingers, not under them. _T_ is like _M_ and _N_ , only the thumb sticks out between the index and middle finger. _U_ is the index and middle fingers straight up touching with no gap in-between, the ring and pinkie are bent down with the thumb touching the tip of the ring finger. _V_ is the same as _U_ , only the index and middle fingers do not touch, making the shape of a 'v' or a peace sign. _W_ is the same as _V_ , just add the ring finger and move the thumb to the tip of the pinkie to make a 'w' or the traditional '3'. The letter _X_ is like the letter _D_ , but the finger is bent slightly at the top and middle joint. _Y_ is the index, middle and ring fingers folded like the letter _A_ and the pinkie and thumb pointed up, for comparison, it looks like the Hawaiian hand signal. The letter _Z_ is the same placement as a _D_ , but use the index finger to draw a _Z_ in the air.

After making their way through the letters, they tackle the numbers zero through ten. Zero is the same as the letter _O_. One through five is done with the palm of the hand facing the signer. One is the index finger up; two is the index and middle finger; three is the index, middle finger and thumb; four is the four fingers up and the thumb in; five is all five digits up, palm still facing the signer. Six through nine the palm is facing the person who the signer is talking to. Six is the thumb touching the pinkie and the other three fingers are up; seven, the thumb moves to the ring finger and the pinkie goes up instead; eight, the thumb goes to the middle finger; and nine the thumb goes to the index finger. Ten is the shape of giving someone a thumb's up, but you wiggle it.

While they managed to get through the alphabet and some numbers, they did run into the problem that Jay had Hailey sit on his right. When signing with one-handed signs, which the alphabet and numbers are, you sign with your dominant hand; for Jay, this is his right and Hailey's left, so while trying to figure the signs out, they kept knocking into each other.

After working their way through the alphabet a few times, the two then try spelling out different words- _fingerspelling_ \- including their names. Once their hands are tired from forming the different shapes, Hailey somehow convinces Jay to take a break.

Hailey moves back to the chair. _How are you doing? You've been so calm throughout all of this._

"I'm… processing," Jay decides on. "It doesn't feel real, but it feels real at the same time. Does that make sense? I have a hard time believing it, but at the same time, I can't hear my voice, I can't hear your voice, I can't hear Will's voice. I can't hear the doctors or nurses or any of the machines I know I was connected to for the first couple of days. But this is my new normal and I can either go forward or I can be stuck on the _what-ifs_. Being a Ranger taught me to look forward, never back," Jay pauses. "I'm kind of tired. Do you mind?" Jay asks.

Hailey smiles, nodding. Jay understands turning on his side facing Hailey, closing his eyes falling into a light sleep.

* * *

Hailey uses this time to lookup more about _deaf culture_ and _American Sign Language_ or _ASL_. Hailey finds information from how to appropriately get a deaf person's attention to the way one signs can represent where they are from like an accent to the 'tone' of how they are speaking. She also saw something about _name signs_ , something she is going to have to lookup more about later.

While Hailey is online, she thinks about the adaptable devices Jay will now have to get. She opens a new tab and searches for what type of devices he will now need in his apartment. Looking online, she realizes that he is going to need an alarm clock, fire and carbon monoxide alarms, and a door signal. Hailey finds many sites, but the most useful are _Sonic Alert_ and _Krown Manufacturing_. Hailey finds many different devices, some are multi-purpose, while others are single purpose. Hailey takes mental notes of the pros and cons of the devices that she believes Jay would like.

When Will arrives an hour later, Hailey is still caught up in her research. "Hey, Hailey," Will whispers, forgetting that Jay can't hear him.

Hailey doesn't answer, absorbed in her computer. Will puts a hand on her shoulder, pulling her out of her computer, "Oh, hey Will. When did you get here?" she asks him.

"Just now. I brought clothes, a book, and sandwiches from Subway," he whispers not wanting to wake his light sleeper of a brother.

"Why are you whispering?" Hailey questions at normal volume.

"Because I don't want to wak…" Will starts, still whispering before realizing what she means. Sighing Will continues, "I keep forgetting."

"It's okay. This is going to be hard on everyone."

"I just don't want to lose my brother again," Will admits looking at Jay.

"You won't."

"You don't know that. If this gets too hard, he's going to push us away."

"He's taking it well right now, but if he tries to push us away, we don't let him and we push back."

"How did he get so lucky to have you as a partner? Most people walk out when things get hard."

"He's my partner- whether or not he's a cop. He's my best friend."

"So, what were you looking at when I walked in?" Will asks changing the subject.

"Jay decided to go the Sign Language path. We went over the alphabet and the numbers zero through ten for two and a half hours. Jay got tired and fell asleep, so I started looking up stuff about deaf culture and ASL. Then I thought about the adaptability devices he's going to need around his apartment."

"I didn't even think about that stuff," Will groans.

"Hey, it's okay. He's still here for a couple more days and after that, we can figure something out so he's not alone until we get everything installed.

"Thanks," Will sighs looking to his brother. "You know, he really trusts you, right?"

"We're partners. We need to on the job."

"No, he's sleeping and doesn't look restless. Jay doesn't sleep unless he feels safe, now that he can't hear, he isn't able to tell if there's danger. That's why I've been trying to not get stuck working the night shift."

"You're a good brother, Will," Hailey comments. "Should we wake him to eat?"

"Yeah, I'll wake him," Will tells her as reaches over to rub Jay's back to rouse him.

"Will?" Jay asks tiredly when he opens his eyes.

Will nods and shows him the sandwich and the bag of clothes.

"Thanks," Jay says accepting the sandwich before setting it down to take the bag of clothes to change into.

After Jay changes, the three of them eat in silence, Will and Hailey not wanting to try to juggle their food and the whiteboard.

When they finish Hailey writes on the board, _Jay we need to talk about when you go home_. She shows him the board.

"What about it?" he asks confused.

_We need to set your place up with the adaptive equipment._

"Like what?"

_An alarm clock, fire and carbon monoxide alarm, door signal._

"What do we have to do?"

_I was already checking out some websites. There are some devices that have multi-purpose use, others are individual. There are also two types of door signals._

"What are the different types?"

_The first is an actual button type and the second is by feeling the vibrations._

"Okay. Can we look at it now or do you need to leave?"

 _We can look now_ , Haile shows him as she pulls her computer back out.

* * *

The three of them spend the next hour carefully going over the different devices. Jay carefully reading the item descriptions and reviews. Will and Hailey periodically pointing to something they think is important and want to make sure Jay sees.

After some reading, Jay decides to go with one company, that way the devices are able to connect to the same base. The alarm clock he chooses has a vibration pad that will go between his mattress and box-spring along with flashing LED lights and an extra loud sound. The vibration and sound are both an optional setting to use.

The next thing that Jay looks at is emergency alarms. Jay chooses one where the receiver has two different color LED flashing lights; blue for carbon monoxide and red for fire. A transmitter will attach to his regular alarms and if they go off, it will send a signal over to the receiver for the corresponding light color to go off, alerting Jay.

"What about the door signal?" Jay asks. "There are so many different types."

 _Let's take it slow. When I was looking at options earlier, I saw a review where someone had a vibration and it went off every time their neighbors' doors did something since the close proximity of an apartment._ Hailey writes.

"But I don't have a doorbell. I live in an apartment."

_There are some that come with doorbell that can easily attach where you want it to. The question is, do you want the signal to be hardwired through your lights or a reciever like signal. I did read that if they're hardwired through the lights, it will only work if your lights are on._

Using this information, Jay chooses a bell style signal that has a receiver with flashing LED lights.

They decide it is best to order three receivers of the door and emergency alarms. One for his living room, where he will pit somewhere that is visible from all points of the room, a second for his bedroom, and a third in the bathroom. When he finishes he gets a confirmation e-mail of his order and a note that delivery will take ten business days.

"Okay, that's one thing done," Jay notes. "Are you sure I can't go home yet?" he asks his brother.

 _No. Jay, you have a skull fracture. Think of it this way, one more day in the ICU and two in a regular room. If everything goes okay, you'll be cleared to go home. But you still need to be taking it easy until the fracture heals. There is something else that we need to talk about though._ Will shows Jay what he wrote.

"What?" Jay questions, unsure where his brother is going.

_Until you get the adaptable devices and get them set up and working, you can't be by yourself. I'm not taking a chance that something happens because Halsteads don't have good luck. We only have bad luck._

"Okay," Jay agrees easily, not having been left alone for long periods of time since losing his hearing. Will is confused why his brother gives in so easily but doesn't want to ask in case it changes his mind.

 _Jay, I'm leaving soon, but do you want to take a walk before I do?_ Hailey asks knowing he has to be going stir crazy. Jay nods quickly, knowing that he won't get a chance later if his brother has to go back to the ED.

Hailey and Jay take a walk around the halls of the ICU. Hailey is close by Jay in case he loses his footing. They walk in silence for twenty minutes as it is not the best idea to walk and write in the halls of the ICU. When they finally decide to go back, Hailey makes sure Jay is settled in the bed again and doesn't need anything before leaving, waving good-bye to both brothers.

* * *

When Hailey leaves, Will turns to Jay to show him the message that he wrote while the two were walking around. _Hailey told me that you guys started on some Sign Language. Do you want to show me?_

"Do you have your computer?" Jay asks, causing Will to pull out his PC. Jay scoots over, patting the space next to him for his brother to sit. Will takes a seat next to his brother. "Type in ASL alphabet," Jay tells him.

Will does as he is told and Jay points to a picture with the alphabet. Jay then proceeds to spend the next two hours going over the letters with his brother. He can see that Will is having trouble, but he never complains or shows his frustrations. Seeing that his brother is trying even though it is hard, lifts a weight off Jay's chest; not sure what he would have done if he couldn't have 'normal' conversations with his brother anymore.

The brothers stop after two and a half hours, Jay's energy levels still not back to normal. Will puts his computer away and goes to get off the bed so Jay can go to sleep. Before he gets all the way off Jay stops him, "Stay?"

Will moves so he is facing Jay, "I'm not leaving," he tells him, first pointing to himself before then pointing to the chair that he previously occupied, so Jay can understand what he said.

"No, here," Jay points to the spot where Will just vacated. "It will ground me," Jay tells his brother giving puppy eyes he knows Will can't say _no_ to.

Will nods his head. Before getting back in his brother's bed, Will moves across the room to turn off the light. He then climbs back into the bed where Jay settles in. Jay lays his head slightly on Will's chest, just like when they were kids, falling into a restful sleep in minutes.

* * *

Will watches Jay sleep. Physically he looks the same, but he is forever different; he just hopes he lets them in unlike his battle with PTSD.

Will uses this time to think about how, unbeknownst to all of them, four days ago was the last day of normalcy. With his brother in a dangerous profession, Will hopes every day that it is never Jay who is brought into the ED where he works. When Ms. Goodwin told him that Jay was being brought in by ambulance, he thought his heart stopped. The last time, his baby brother was barely alive. This time, he was again unconscious, but he was also on a backboard and had a c-collar on.

The thought of Jay having spinal damage scared Will. Not because he would think differently of his brother, but because he knows the mental damage paralysis would have on Jay. His brother is that person who is never still, even when most people outgrow that as adults, that never left him.

The feeling of relief when he found out that there was indeed no spinal damage was short-lived when he found out about the skull fracture and swelling in the brain. Being a doctor means that he knows and prepares for the worst-case-scenarios.

Walking into his brother's ICU room after Hailey hit the call button, he could see the fear in Jay's eyes. He wanted to break seeing his little brother like that, but couldn't because Jay needed to be able to lean on him.

So far, Jay has been taking his situation in stride, but Will knows that his attitude can't last forever. It's only a matter of time before he breaks, the only question is: Will Hailey and him be able to pick up the pieces?

From the battery of tests, to the hearing test and getting fitted for hearing aids, to starting to learn a new language, to getting adaptive devices for around his apartment, and most importantly, the knowledge that he can never be in the field as a cop again. Will wonders when this is all going to catch up on him.

Looking down at Jay, Will wishes that they were kids again- to a time where he knew he could protect him. Protect him form anything and everything. He knows that Hailey is going to stick by Jay's side, but he has to wonder how the rest of the team is going to react and if they will stick by him.

Will takes one more look at his sleeping brother before going to sleep himself, knowing the only thing he can do is show Jay he has the support of his brother, the brother that wasn't there before but is here now. The brother that as kids could make everything better. The brother that would do anything to fix this. The brother that that would do anything to give Jay their mom, knowing she would know exactly what to do in this situation; the woman who would do anything for her boys. The one person Jay probably needs right now but can't have.

Will drifts into a light sleep, mind still reeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in Fanfiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please read go over to Fanfiction and read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/2/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ Differences from the One-Shot and Chapter 1  
> \+ ASL, PSE, SimCom, regional signs, and other signed languages  
> +Signing Sundays  
> \+ Notes about different factors in Deaf Culture  
> \+ AND A VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT NOTE


	3. Breaking the News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay, Hailey, and Will work on more Sign Language. Hailey helps Jay break the news to the rest of the team. And Jay encounters his first challenge with a hearing person before going home.

Key:

_Text_

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

When Hailey arrives the next morning to check on Jay before she goes into work, the two brothers are in the same position. Jay slightly on top of Will, sleeping peacefully. Not wanting to wake either of them, Hailey slowly and quietly walks out of the room. She knows that Jay can't hear her, but Will can and the way they are laying any sudden movement can wake Jay.

Will doesn't wake up until the alarm on his phone goes off just before breakfast is going to be brought in for Jay. At first, he doesn't remember why he isn't in the uncomfortable chair, but remembers when he feels Jay's head on his chest.

Will rubs Jay's arm, hoping to wake him without startling him. Jay blinks slowly, waking up.

"Did you sleep okay?" Will asks, making the motion of pretending to sleep and then giving a thumbs up and cocking his head to help Jay understand what he said.

"Yeah, what time is it?" Jay asks sitting up.

Will grabs the whiteboard, _7:30. They're going to be bringing breakfast in for you soon. And I need to go to work, but I'll check in with you on my break. I brought a book and your iPad for you to pass the time._

"Okay, thanks, Will."

* * *

Jay's last day in the ICU was relatively calm. He was taken for one more scan to approve his move to a regular room and like the past four days, his only visitors were Will and Hailey due to the restrictions of visitors.

Will checked in on Jay when he had a break between patients and Hailey spends her lunch with Jay and checked on him when they had to take a statement from a victim who was at Med, along with texting him throughout the day.

Jay spends the day going between reading and looking up different ways to learn sign.

Hailey visits Jay again when her shift is over. _How was your day?_ Hailey writes when she grabs the whiteboard.

"Boring. I read some and then I was looking up some sites to learn sign."

_Any good ones?_

"Yeah, this website that lists the top nine ways to learn. It looks like eight can be useful, one is for British Sign Language. There are six websites and two apps," Jay tells Hailey as he shows her the first website.

Hailey takes her seat next to Jay and the two start to watch the videos, paying close attention to the hand shapes. Both notice that with some signs, the handshape makes sense with the word, like for the color green, it is a "G" that you shake in front of you.

The two are so focused on learning new signs that they don't notice when a nurse comes in. The nurse who comes in doesn't bother to remind Hailey that the beds are only for the patients because it is only when Hailey and Will are in the room with Jay he is not in a mood or driving the nurses insane.

"Detective," he calls. Hailey looks up before he continues, "an orderly is going to be in within ten minutes to move him to a regular room."

"Okay, thanks," Hailey tells the nurse before turning to relay the message to Jay. _They're moving you to a regular room soon. About ten minutes._

"You know, I feel strong- like I can go home and rest there," Jay tries. Hailey only gives him a look that says, _nice try_ , while grabbing his things tor when he gets moved. "I had to try."

_Two days and you can go home._

"That's if everything goes okay." Hailey raises her eyebrow as if asking if he plans on something going wrong that would keep him in the hospital any longer. "I never have any luck with these things."

_You won't if you keep that attitude._

Before Jay can answer, the orderly appears with a wheelchair to move him.

* * *

The move takes all of fifteen minutes, most of which was Jay arguing with Hailey about using the wheelchair.

Once Jay is settled and finishes his dinner, Hailey tells him, _We finished the case. The others are going to come by and visit tomorrow if you're okay with it._

"What am I going to tell them? What am I going to do about work?" Jay asks.

_You tell them the truth. They're going to figure it out when they have to use the whiteboard to talk with you. As for work, you can't do anything until the skull fracture heals. They might put you in a lab._

"I can't do lab work. I never went to college. I enlisted straight out of high school."

 _We'll find something for you to do_ , Hailey promises.

"Okay."

After that conversation, there is a heaviness in the air so the two sit in silence until Hailey needs to go. She checks. What happens now that Jay can't be a detective. to make sure he doesn't need anything before she leaves, with the promise to stop by tomorrow.

Jay falls asleep, still down about the whole job situation.

Will walks in to find Jay in the same position hours later with frown marks on his face, even in his sleep.

Will spends his fifth night in a row sleeping in his brother's hospital room; this is the fourth night in the uncomfortable bedside chair.

* * *

Day six of his hospital stay is the first day where visitors aren't restricted. Jay is mostly back to his normal self for the most part, minus the hearing loss; meaning his internal alarm is again waking him at six sharp. Unable to go back to sleep, Jay grabs the book that Will brought him, Stephen King's _Under the Dome_. Leave it to Will to bring a big book to try to keep Jay from signing out AMA.

When Will stops by on his lunch break, Jay has stopped reading and gone back to his iPad looking at different sign language videos. To get Jay's attention without getting his arm broken or getting attacked, Will flashes the lights on and off a couple of times.

Jay looks up, "Hey Will. Are you going to get me outta here?" Jay asks hopefully.

Will shakes his head. _No. Nice try, I was thinking about saving you from another hospital meal. Do you want me to pick up Chinese for dinner?_

"Yeah, thanks."

 _Fried rice and chow mein?_ Will writes, knowing it's his brother's usual.

"Thanks."

_Okay, I have to get back to work, but I'll bring your dinner in around six._

"Okay. Hailey texted me, she said that her and the rest of the team will stop by after work. So, probably seven or eight."

Will squeezes Jay's shoulder before leaving him alone again.

* * *

Jay spends the rest of the afternoon looking at beginners' videos for sign language, reading, texting Hailey, and taking a few naps since he is still recovering.

Just before six o'clock, Will walks into Jay's hospital room with the bag of the Chinese take-out. " **G-O-W W-A-E your F-A-Y?** " Will asks, fingerspelling most of the words and mixing up some of the letters, he also just pointed at Jay for the word 'your'.

"Did you just ask 'how was your day?'" questions Jay.

Will nods his head, looking for the whiteboard. _Yeah, I was trying to. How bad did I mess up?_

" _G_ instead of an _H_ ; _E_ instead of an _S_ ; and _F_ instead of a _D_ ," Jay tells him while signing each letter he mentions. "They're close enough to confuse," Jay adds giving a small smile.

_What's the smile for?_

"Thanks," is his only answer. "For trying," Jay adds at his brother's confused look.

 _You're my brother. Of course, I'm going to try_ , Will writes. When Jay reads this and looks back up, Will pulls Jay into a hug.

"Our food is going to get cold," Jay comments.

Will let's go and hands Jay his food while taking a seat next to the bed. The two eat in a comfortable silence, finishing shortly before the team gets there.

"They're here," Jay tells Will looking up from his phone.

" **A-L-L**?" Will asks.

"Yeah."

_Okay, I'm going to give you some time with them. I'll be back later tonight._

"Can you have Hailey and Voight come in first? I want to– telling him is going to be the hardest. Telling him means that I'm not a cop anymore."

Will nods leaving the room.

* * *

In the waiting room, the intelligence unit is waiting for Jay to be ready for visitors.

"I thought his visitors weren't restricted anymore?" Ruzek asks.

"No, they're not, but Will is with him now," Hailey answers.

Before Ruzek can make another comment, Will walks into the waiting room where they are. "Can we see him?" Kim asks.

"He actually wants to talk with you first, Sergeant Voight," Will directs at his brother's boss before turning to Hailey, "Jay wants you in there too."

Voight nods and Hailey shows him to Jay's room.

Hailey and Voight enter Jay's room to see him sitting up in bed looking at something on his iPad. Hailey goes ahead of their boss so she can get his attention without scaring him.

Hailey goes next to the bed placing a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently and Jay looks up after a second. Voight is surprised by Jay's lack of jumpiness at being touched.

"Hey, Sarge," Jay greets trying to make his voice match his normal volume.

"Halstead, how are you feeling?" Voight asks his detective, unaware that Jay has no idea what is being said to him.

Jay looks to Hailey, getting a reassuring look from her before speaking. Jay speaks after taking a deep breath, "I-I can't hear you. I can't hear anything."

"What do you mean?" Voight asks, in shock not realizing he is literally speaking on deaf ears.

" _C-A-N I T-E-L-L him_?" Hailey asks, while making sure Voight can't see her hand, fingerspelling the words 'can' and 'tell' and pointing to herself and Voight for the respective people. Jay nods.

"The doctors think that the combination of the head trauma Jay suffered along with the noise from the bomb caused his hearing loss. He's ranging between severe and profound hearing loss," Hailey tells him.

Jay can tell when Hailey is done speaking by the look on Voight's face. "I know this means that I can't be a cop anymore," Jay speaks what he's been dreading the reality of.

"Use this," Hailey tells their boss as she hands him the whiteboard that has been in Jay's room since they discovered his hearing loss.

 _Is there something that can be done about it?_ Voight asks.

"No. The audiologist said that I should start learning new ways to communicate and that she doesn't like the idea of cochlear implants."

_Cochlear implants?_

"We don't know what they are," Hailey answers looking at the whiteboard to see what their sergeant is asking Jay. "Will mentioned it, but the audiologist that has Jay's case said that she doesn't like to suggest them because any residue hearing left will be lost and it doesn't cure the hearing loss, but rewires the brain to hear electronically. She said either way he should start looking into a different career."

"Okay, I'm going to see what I can do on my end. Maybe I can pull some strings and get him a position at one of the desks."

"Okay, let's not tell him in case it doesn't work out. I don't want to get his hopes up."

_I need to take care of some things. I'll send the others in on my way out._

Jay reads what he wrote, nodding letting Voight know he understands.

Voight leaves the room, leaving the two detectives alone. Before the rest of the team comes into the room, Jay places a hand on Hailey's arm to get her attention.

Hailey raises an eyebrow, to ask what is wrong.

Jay points to Voight, asking, " _Is he M-A-D_?" Pointing to their boss to indicate who he is talking about and fingerspelling the word _mad_.

" _N-O I P-R-PO-M-I-S-E_ ," Hailey tells him pointing to herself and fingerspelling the rest. Before Hailey can say anything else, she hears the voices of their teammates getting close to Jay's room. To let Jay know, she looks towards the door then points between the door and the chair for visitors, hoping he gets what she is trying to communicate.

Jay takes a second to figure it out but gives her a thumbs up when he does.

Not five seconds later does the rest of the team join them in Jay's room. Vanessa, Kevin, Kim, and Adam all greeting Jay at once happy to see him doing better, as the last time they saw him he was still unconscious. The four of them all try talking to Jay at once, asking him questions. It is hard for Hailey to understand what they are saying as they are all taking over each other. Looking over to Jay, she sees that he is staring at them with a blank look, but can see the pleading look in his eyes for help.

"Guys," Hailey yells causing the rest of the team to stop. "Let Jay talk then you can ask questions." Hailey looks to the officers of the team and Jay; the questions stop and Jay starts once he sees that all their mouths stop moving.

Jay sighs before starting, "I can't hear. When I hit my head, it caused damage to my hearing."

Hearing this, the officers of the unit all start ask questions, not believing what they were just told. Jay, unable to understand any of them, looking over to Hailey for help.

"Guys, stop it," Hailey speaks over them. "If you have a question, you need to write it down for him."

"Give that to me," Kim tells Hailey motioning to the whiteboard. _Is this permanent?_

"Most likely," Jay answers cautiously.

Kevin is the next one to take the whiteboard, _What happens now?_

Jay looks to Hailey for help as he is still overwhelmed with all the information that has been thrown at him in the past six days. Hailey nods, understanding what Jay wants. "So far, an audiologist has been working with Jay. He has had molds of his ears taken for hearing aids– but with the type of hearing loss he has, they will only help with ambient noise. Will and I also help Jay with getting adaptive devices for in his apartment-"

"Adaptive devices?" Adam questions, confused.

"He can't hear. What happens when his smoke detector goes off and he doesn't know? When someone is at the door?"

"Oh."

"Ignore him," Kim tells Hailey. "Is there anything we can do?"

"The audiologist gave Jay different choices for methods of communication. He decided on learning sign language."

"So, you're saying we should learn to sign?" Kim clarifies.

"It would really help– even if it's just the basics."

"But he can talk," Adam states confused.

"But that doesn't help him know what we're saying," Vanessa speaks up. "How hard can it be?" She asks Hailey.

"It's not going to be easy, but it isn't impossible," Hailey answers.

"What about reading lips? Isn't that a thing?" Adam is still confused.

"Even the best lip-readers only get about thirty percent of what is said," Hailey answers.

"Adam, you can learn the basics," Kim tells him. "You're asking Jay to hear, something he physically can't do. I remember learning the alphabet in elementary school one year. I don't remember much though. You can learn."

 _How are you handling it?_ Vanessa asks.

"I'm processing," Jay answers.

The group continues to talk with modifications to include Jay until a nurse kicks them out for the night.

" **D-O you want me T-O G-E-T W-I-L-L**?" Hailey asks. She points to Jay for the word 'you'; the sign for 'want' both hands are out in front of her, palms up, fingers bent at the lower knuckle so they are slightly pointing at the sky. She then bends her elbows so her hands move closer to her chest. She points to herself for the sign 'me' and fingerspells the rest.

"I don't want to bother him. He hasn't slept at home since I was brought in," Jay answers. Hailey looks at him, letting him know that she thinks its bullshit that he would be a bother to Will.

 _Will's your brother. He wants to make sure you're okay_ , Hailey writes, having too many words that she doesn't know to sign.

"I'm not his responsibility," Jay tells her.

"He's not who's responsibility?" Will asks while walking into his brother's room.

Hailey looks to Jay and jerks her head in the direction of the older Halstead, to let him know that Will heard him.

"Doesn't matter, Will," Jay tells him.

"Talk some sense into him. And don't listen when he says nothing," Hailey tells Will before turning to Jay, _I'm going home. Will see you tomorrow._

 _What's going on?_ Will asks.

"Nothing."

 _You can't lie to your big brother. No matter how hard you try. So, what's this about you not being who's_ responsibility _?_

"I'm not your responsibility," Jay answers, staring straight ahead, not looking at Will.

Will nudges Jay, indicating that he wants him to move over. Will makes himself comfortable next to his brother. _You're my brother. Nothing will change that. Are things going to be different now? Yes. But, I'm just glad that I still have my brother._

"You should go home. You haven't left since I was brought in. Sleep in a real bed."

_I'm fine. Go to sleep._

Jay looks at Will closely, trying to determine if he is lying. When Jay decides Will is telling the truth, he lays back leaning slightly on his brother to keep him grounded while he sleeps.

* * *

Jay's night is peaceful and he only stirs when he feels Will move from underneath his head. "Will?" He questions tiredly.

Will just runs his hand through Jay's hair, trying to get him to go back to bed as he is getting up for his shift in the ED and it is still very early. Jay sighs and settles back into his pillow before falling back to sleep.

* * *

The next time Jay wakes up, it's because he senses someone else in the room with him. Jay looks around and spots a nurse in the room with him.

Seeing that her patient is awake she places his breakfast on the portable tray before speaking to him really slowly. When she sees his confused look, she speaks even slower and unbeknownst to Jay, even louder.

Jay looks away and starts poking at his food. Seeing that Jay isn't going to say anything to her, she leaves to tend to her other patients.

Jay eats his breakfast, glad that this is his last day at the hospital. As Jay is finishing, the lights in his room start flashing on and off.

Jay looks up to see Hailey at the doorway. "Hey," he greets.

Hailey smiles at him in greeting, knowing that he can't hear her if she responds verbally. _How is it going?_ Hailey asks.

Jay sighs, "I just want to go home."

 _Later today,_ Hailey tells him. _I know you hate hospitals, but Will said you need to get a couple of tests done, and then you'll be released._

"It's not that. The nurse was just talking to me really slowly. And when I didn't answer I'm pretty sure she started taking even slower."

Not knowing what to say, Hailey rubs his back. _Do you want to talk to Will? See if he can do something about the nurse"_

"No."

_Okay, I'll pick you up when you can go home. Just text me, okay?_

"Yeah, thanks, Hailey."

Hailey gives Jay the silent message of squeezing his shoulder before leaving.

* * *

Jay spends the day on his iPad looking for more websites on ASL and reading some of the Stephen King book that Will brought him.

Around ten o'clock, Will walks into his brother's room to find him reading a book. Will grabs the whiteboard, _Okay, you need to have one more MRI and CT scan, then we can get your discharge papers._

Will holds the whiteboard slightly within Jay's line of sight so he could see it and wouldn't be startled. Jay looks up and reads what his brother wrote. "Do I have to wait for the results?" He asks.

_Just the preliminary results. A more in-depth result will be in tomorrow, but as long as there isn't a problem with the preliminary results, you can go home. Is Hailey coming to get you or am I taking you home?_

"Hailey said she would get me. I just need to text her," Jay tells him. Will nods letting Jay know he heard.

_An orderly should be in soon with a wheelchair to take you for the test._

Jay gives Will a look.

_It's a wheelchair or a stretcher._

Jay sighs in defeat.

* * *

"How's Jay doing?" Kim asks when Hailey comes in

"Okay. Will says he needs to have two more tests done and then he can go home," Hailey answers.

"But how's he handling the losing his hearing part?"

"He's being Jay. I don't know if it's going to hit him later or if he just doesn't want me to see his reaction."

"Sounds like him," Kim comments. "Let us know if you need anything."

Before Hailey could say anything, Voight comes out of his office. "We got a no-knock warrant. Let's go."

* * *

Will grabs Jay's attention when the orderly arrives. _I need to get back to the ED, but I'll be here when your tests are done. It should be close to two hours_.

"You don't need to."

_I don't trust that you won't try to check out AMA._

"I haven't yet."

_I'll see you when you're done._

Jay gets settled in the wheelchair and the orderly pushes him to radiology where the test will be done.

Jay is happy to see that the technician is prepared with a whiteboard with instructions for him. The only thing that he needs to do is be as still as possible and the machine will do all the work.

The MRI takes about an hour to complete. He is then taken to get a CT done, the prep taking a half an hour and the actual scan took another half an hour.

Jay is once again impressed when the technician is prepared with the whiteboard to communicate, unlike the nurse who was in his room that morning.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Jay asks when he sees his brother when he is wheeled back to his room.

_I told you I would be here when you're done._

"Don't you have to work?"

_It's fine. Don't worry about it._

"When will they have the test?"

_Half an hour. You want to text Hailey?_

Jay pulls out his phone and sends a text to Hailey.

* * *

"What's the chance that we can pull off another warrant like that?" Adam asks as the group returns to their desks.

"Unlikely," Hailey answers. Before she can continue, her phone dings, signaling that she has a text message. Hailey checks it, knowing that Jay is being released today.

 _Will says I'll probably be discharged in half an hour_ , the text from Jay reads.

 _Okay, I'll be there to take you home_ , Hailey answers.

Hailey then goes to Voight's office and knocks. Voight looks up and motions for her to come in.

"What can I do for you Hailey?"

"Jay is getting released in a half an hour," she starts.

"Go ahead. Are you going to be taking the rest of the day?"

"If it's not a problem. Will and I still need to figure out a schedule to stay with him; just until the adaptive devices come in and we can get them installed in his apartment."

"Okay, take the rest of today and tomorrow to get that figured out with Will," Voight tells Hailey dismissing her.

* * *

 _Ready?_ Hailey texts Jay walking into his hospital room, flicking the lights to let him know that she is in the room.

"He's running behind," Jay tells her.

Before Hailey can grab the whiteboard to reply, a doctor walks in.

The doctor pulls up the images on his iPad before he starts talking, "Everything looks good. No bleeds, no swelling. It looks like it's healing good. Just take it easy for a couple of weeks. Any questions?"

"He can't hear you," Will tells the doctor annoyed.

"Oh, do _you_ have any questions then?"

"No. But you should be more accommodating to your patients."

Jay sighs, seeing that this guy is the same as the nurse from this morning. Hailey hears Jay and looks at him. Jay shakes his head, letting her know he doesn't want to talk about it.

 _He said that everything looked good and that you just need to take it easy for a couple of weeks_ , Will tells him.

"Okay. Can I go home now? I just want to go home," Jay begs.

" **Yeah, O-K** ," Hailey signs, making the _S_ shape with her left hand, bending her wrist so it looks like her fist is a head nodding, the sign for _yes_. She then signs the letters _O_ and _K_.

 _I'm going to get a wheelchair. Don't argue– hospital policy_ , Will tells him before leaving the room.

Jay knows that Hailey wants to know if he wants to talk, before she has a chance to ask, Jay tells her, "I don't want to talk about it."

_Ok, but if you change your mind, I'm here. So is Will._

Jay looks away, so Hailey starts writing something else.

Putting her hand on his shoulder, Hailey shows him the new message, _Let's get you home._

Jay gives a small nod as Will comes back in with the wheelchair.

Before Will lets Hailey leave with Jay he writes out, _My shift is done at 4. I'll come to your place when I'm done._

"Thanks, Will," Hailey answers, knowing how the doctor treated Jay got the younger Halstead in a mood.

* * *

Once Jay is in the passenger side of Hailey's car, she returns the wheelchair before getting into the driver's side. Seeing that Jay still isn't his normal self, she places her hand on his forearm and gives it a reassuring squeeze before pulling out of the hospital parking lot and in the direction of Jay's apartment building.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in Fanfiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please go over there to read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/3/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ Side note  
> \+ Explanation on signing experience for characters.  
> \+ Upstead status  
> \+ Places to learn ASL (ASL is used in the USA and *English-speaking* parts of Canada).  
> \+ Notes on Deaf Culture and ASL.  
> \+ Signing Sunday.  
> \+ Questions & Comments Answered
> 
> QUESTION FOR YOU ALL: 1) When I first posted as a one-shot, I got a review, I forget what it said exactly, but it basically asked if Jay would end up working at Molly's. What would you like to see Jay doing now that he can't be in the field/be a cop (because we know that he's not meant for a desk)? 2) What are some physical or personality traits that the team has, individually, that would be a part of their sign name?


	4. Realizations of Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay's new reality finally hits him. Will and Hailey try to help him cope.

Key:

_ Text _

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

The drive to Jay's apartment is quiet as they can't write and drive at the same time and fingerspelling whole sentences would be cumbersome.

Hailey knows that the way the doctor was treating Jay got to him, but at the same time she doesn't want to push as she doesn't want him to lock her out. And seeing that he can't hear her, it's not like she can yell at him until he listens.

When they arrive to his apartment, Jay gets out once the car is stopped and starts towards his building, not waiting for Hailey.

Hailey follows, knowing that if she can't get through to him, she will have to wait for Will to get home, and sometimes letting two stubborn, hard-headed Halsteads go at it with each other is not the best choice– and this would be one of them.

* * *

Entering his apartment, the first thing that Jay does is go into his room to throw his bag on his bed to put everything away later. He then comes out to where Hailey is waiting for him. Ignoring his partner, Jay grabs the television remote and turns on the television. He turns up the volume as loud as it will go, trying to hear something.

The noise is making Hailey's ears ring, but she understands that Jay needs to do this. Until now he has just been going along with everything he's been told; like he skipped the denial stage and went right to acceptance.

Jay throws the remote down to the ground and collapses to the couch. Hailey grabs the remote to mute the television before sitting down next to him, pulling him into a tight hug.

After several moments, Jay pulls away. _What's going on in that head of yours?_ Hailey writes out on the whiteboard.

"What happens now? What do I do for work? What…" Jay his breathing becomes erratic and Hailey can tell he is working his way into a panic attack.

Hailey has talked him down from plenty of panic attacks in the past, but this time was different. This time she couldn't talk to him and hope that her voice will bring him back to the present; so, she places her hand on his back and rubs circles on it, hoping that he can feel it. When that doesn't work, Hailey takes Jay's hand and places it on her upper chest, and starts taking slow deep breaths hoping that Jay would match his breathing, her other hand still rubbing his back.

When that doesn't work, Hailey wraps him into another hug, exaggerating her breathing hoping he can feel the pattern.

It takes several minutes for his breathing to become somewhat regular again. It takes another ten minutes before he is calm again. Jay leans against Hailey, and she can tell that his body is relaxing as the panic attack ends.

Hailey moves over and guides Jay so he is laying down with his head in her lap. She then starts running her hand through his hair, not knowing how else she can help him and just worried about her partner.

* * *

For the next twenty minutes, Hailey watches as Jay sleeps, exhausted from his panic attack, lost in her thoughts until her phone goes off. Looking at her phone she sees that it is Will, probably calling to check in on how Jay is doing.

"Hey," she answers.

"Hey. I have a short break. How's he doing?" Will questions.

"He's sleeping," Hailey answers while still playing with his hair. She shakily takes a breath before continuing, "I think it finally hit him."

"What happened? Is he okay?"

"Physically, he's fine. But… I don't know emotionally. When we got back to his apartment, he went into his room to put his bag away. Then he came out and turned on the TV and turned the volume all the way up. It was like he was trying to hear anything, then he just collapsed onto the couch like he was defeated," Hailey continues and Will can hear her voice shaking.

"When he had calmed down, I asked him what he was thinking about and he started to answer with a bunch of questions, but it was like he worked himself into a panic attack. It probably took fifteen, twenty minutes to calm down and he fell asleep after. He's been sleeping for twenty minutes now."

"Okay, can you stay with him until I get off? I'll talk with Goodwin and see if I can get some time off and get Jay up to the cabin. Get him away for a couple of days; he always loved it up there."

"Yeah, no problem. Voight already gave me the rest of today and tomorrow off," Hailey answers.

"Were you expecting a problem?"

"No, but I did mention how you and I need to figure out some type of schedule to stay with Jay until the adaptive devices come in and we can get them installed."

"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I get done here, and Hailey?" Will pauses. "Thanks for being here for Jay," he adds gratefully.

"Take your time, we'll be fine. And you don't need to thank me. I'd do anything for Jay, he's my partner and best friend."

"He's lucky to have a friend like you," Will responds before hanging up.

Hailey puts her phone down before looking back to Jay and thinks how she's the lucky one to have Jay as a friend.

* * *

"Who was that? A girlfriend?" Maggie asks the red-headed doctor.

"No, it was Hailey. I wanted to see how Jay was doing," Will answers.

"Is he okay?"

"Considering? Yeah, I mean, Hailey said she thinks it finally hit him, but all things considering– it could have been a lot worse."

Maggie gives a small smile, knowing it's a lot and affecting Will too, "Well, if either of you needs anything, let me know," the charge nurse tells him.

"Thanks, Maggie."

"Will, you're with me," Marcel tells Will while making his way into trauma four.

* * *

Jay starts to stir in Hailey's lap. Seeing this, Hailey starts rubbing his back, in between his shoulder blades, to let him know that she's still there.

"Hailey?" He questions, sleepily.

With Jay's back facing her, Hailey uses her thumb to spell out 'yeah' on his back.

"Why did this happen to me?" Jay questions, now sitting up.

 _I don't know_ , she writes down, wishing she had a better answer.

"What's going to happen now?"

_With what?_

"With everything."

_You, Will, and me. We are going to learn how to sign. The rest of the team will learn too. It's probably going to be different degrees of proficiency but they want to be able to communicate with you. We aren't going to let you become isolated._

"What about work?

_We can worry about that later. Even if your hearing wasn't affected, you still wouldn't be cleared to work for a couple of weeks– even for desk duty._

"What about you? Shouldn't you be at work?"

_Voight gave me the rest of today and tomorrow off._

"I don't want you to miss work because of me," Jay tells her as he reads while she writes. "I could have waited for Will to get done his shift. Sometimes they let me hang out in the doctors' lounge when I'm waiting for him."

_I don't mind and the team understands. Family. Besides, I wasn't leaving you to fend for yourself when you were just discharged from Med, I'm not that mean. And two, remember, Will and I don't want you to be on your own until we can get your adaptive devices set up._

"I just hate being a burden to you and Will."

 _You're not a burden. You're Will's brother and you're my partner and best friend. You could never be a burden. Understand?_ She tells him grabbing his arm and giving a comforting squeeze when she finishes writing.

"I guess," Jay whispers, barely audible.

_You are not a burden. And I will tell you however many times you need to hear it until you believe me._

* * *

"Miss Goodwin," Will knocks on the chief of services' office door.

"Come in," she calls. "Will, how's your brother?" She asks when she sees it's the red-haired doctor.

"That's what I'm here about. I know it's short notice, but I wanted to see if I can get the next couple of days off. I can work the night shift to make up for it. Jay's having trouble adjusting and I want to get him away from the hustle of the city for a bit," Will explains.

"Okay, I understand. Why don't you take a week and we can put it under FMLA leave?" Miss Goodwin suggests.

"Thank you, Miss Goodwin," Will thanks graciously.

"Just take care of your brother."

Will nods in understanding.

* * *

 _Give me your phone_ , Hailey tells Jay.

"Why?" Jay asks as he hands over his iPhone.

 _I want to see about the settings for accessibility,_ Hailey answers while going into the settings of his phone. She then touches the screen where accessibility is and scrolls down to 'hearing'. Hailey then turns on the RTT, phone noise cancellation, LED flash for alerts, flash on silent, the closed captioning, sound recognition, and FaceTime detects sign language on his phone before returning the device to Jay.

Jay looks at his phone, "Is this, me being deaf, going to change anything between us? I mean I know I can't be a cop anymore, but I don't want to lose your friendship," Jay tells her without looking up.

_You're not going to lose me. Are some things going to change? Yes. But us being friends isn't. You're my best friend and probably one of my closest friends._

Before Jay can say anything, Hailey hears a knock at his door. Hailey points to the door before getting up to see who it is. Looking through the peephole, she sees its Will. The blonde detective turns to Jay, "It's **W-I-L-L** ," she tells him, pointing to the door and then spelling out his brother's name.

"Okay," Jay answers and Hailey opens the door.

"Hey, Will," Hailey greets Will letting him in. "You brought Kohl?"

"Yeah, I got a week off. If we leave tonight, Jay can wake up there tomorrow instead of leaving in the morning."

"I didn't tell him that's what you were planning," Hailey tells the older Halstead as they watch Kohl cuddle up to Jay on the couch where Jay seems surprised but happy to see the old dog. "I didn't want to get his hopes up if you couldn't get the time off."

"It's fine. I understand," Will answers.

"Will, before you talk to him, you should know that he has this idea in his head that he's a burden to us."

"What?" Will asks in disbelief.

"He thinks that he's a burden on us."

"Why?"

"Because of how we talked about him not being alone until the adaptive devices come and we can get them installed."

"Okay, I'll take care of it."

"I know you're talking about me," Jay states looking up to his brother and partner.

" **Sorry** ," Will apologizes, making an _a_ shape with his right hand, placing it on his chest, and moving it in a circular motion, while Hailey gives Jay an apologetic smile.

"Why'd you bring Kohl?" Jay asks.

 _I got some time off. What do you think about going up to the cabin?_ Will asks in return.

"You're not in trouble for taking time?"

_No, I cleared it with Goodwin._

Jay looks between Will and Hailey, trying to tell what they are thinking.

 _I think it's a good idea_ , Hailey tells Jay. _It will get you away from the city while you recover._

"You're not mad that you have tomorrow off because of me and now I won't be here?"

" **No** ," Hailey answers pinkie and ring finger bent down while her pointer and index finger touch like the letter _h_ and come down to meet her thumb.

Will can see Jay breaking, _Go pack. Bring enough for a week._

Jay looks surprised at the amount of time. _Go pack. If we leave within an hour, we can get there before 2_ , Will tells him pointing towards Jay's room.

When Jay goes into his room to pack, Hailey asks Will, "Is he going to be okay? What if something happens with his skull fracture?"

"He'll be fine, as long as he takes it easy. His scans looked good before he left, as long as he doesn't aggravate it."

"This is Jay, will he?"

"At the cabin? Yes," Will answers confidently.

"Okay."

"Do you think you can come with us? I can handle the medical things, but he doesn't- I can't- he just opens up to you on an emotional level more than anyone. I think the only person he was more open with is Mouse, and that might be because they went through the same thing."

"I'll talk to Voight. Even if I can get a couple days, I could drive up on my own."

* * *

"How's Halstead?" Voight questions when he picks up.

"Okay, considering. He's actually packing. Will's taking him up to a cabin that their grandfather left to Jay or something."

"For how long?"

"Will got a week off."

"Are you going with them?"

"Will thinks I should, but we haven't said anything to Jay yet," Hailey starts.

"Go. Your partner needs you. I can get a loan out detective until you're back," Voight offers.

"Thanks," Hailey manages to respond before Voight hangs up.

"Well?" Will asks when Hailey walks back into Jay's living room.

"I can go. He said he could get a loan out detective until I get back."

"Is something wrong with Voight?" Will questions. "I mean this seems weird."

"I don't know. I think everyone is just worried about Jay."

"Speaking of the rest of your team, how did they handle it?" Will questions, wanting to know how his brother's friends taking this news.

Before Hailey can answer, Jay walks back into the living room before Hailey can answer. "Later," Hailey answers quickly before Jay reaches them.

"Are you going to ride with us?" Will asks.

"Can you follow me back to my place? That way I can pack and leave Vanessa my car to use."

"Yeah, no problem," Will answers before turning to Jay. _Ready?_

"Yeah. Are you sure about this? I don't want you to miss work because of me."

_I'm sure. It will be good to get a break. Hailey's coming too._

Jay looks to Hailey, "But Voight doesn't have any detectives if you aren't working."

_Voight is going to get a loan-out detective until I get back._

"You're not mad that you have to take time off?"

Hailey shakes her head.

Seeing that Jay is hesitant, Will grabs Jay by the elbow and starts to guide him towards the door and Hailey follows behind the two brothers with Kohl's leash in hand.

Jay gets into the passenger side of Will's car and Hailey gets Kohl in the back seat before getting into her own car.

* * *

"Hey," Vanessa greets when Hailey walks into their home.

"Hey, I'm leaving for a week. I'll leave you my car to use," Hailey tells the young officer.

"Something to do with Jay?"

"He's not adjusting well. Will's taking Jay to some cabin up in Wisconsin and wants me to go to help with the emotional aspect."

"Emotion aspect?"

"Jay doesn't talk to Will."

"Hailey, when are you going to admit your feeling to Jay? Everyone knows but Jay," Vanessa tells the blonde while following her into her bedroom as Hailey packs a bag.

"Now isn't the time. His world just got turned upside-down. And I don't want to ruin our friendship if he doesn't feel the same way," Hailey answers after throwing some things into her bag.

"If this isn't the time, then when is? This is the second time since I've been here that he could have died. Life's too short to wait. And everyone knows that Jay feels the same way– every time he looks at you, he looks at you with heart-eyes."

"Jay needs a constant in his life right now. I don't want him to think I'm telling him because he lost his hearing. He needs a friend right now, not a complicated relationship."

"Fine, but when things settle down and he has a new normal, you should tell him."

"Maybe," Hailey answers while zipping up her bag. "I need to go, Jay and Will are waiting in the car."

* * *

"Hey?" Hailey questions when she gets to Will's car.

"Hey, Hailey," Will greets.

"Why did Jay move to the back?"

"He said that he was probably going to sleep most of the time so you could have the front. I also think it has something to do with Kohl," Will adds, looking to Jay who's already asleep in the backseat.

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever he crashes at my place, Kohl stays with him. I think he still needs the contact to ground him since he lost his hearing."

"He slept on his own since?" Hailey asks as Will turns on to the road.

"Not peacefully," Will answers.

"Is there anything we can do to help him?"

"I don't know."

* * *

The ride is silent for a while. Jay and Kohl sleeping in the backseat, Hailey looking out the window, and Will focused on the road.

"How are the others taking this?" Will asks, surprising Hailey.

"I'm sorry?"

"What we were talking about before? How is your team taking this?"

"I think they're in shock. Kim and Vanessa seemed like they would be willing to learn some sign for Jay. Adam was Adam, it took a minute for him to get it; Kev was quiet– I think he was still processing when he left. Voight said he was going to see if he could pull some strings to put Jay at a desk."

"That's good. It will be good for him to still have communication with the team. I don't know how happy Jay will be with being stuck at a desk, but it's better than nothing. That was nice of Voight."

"I don't know how Jay will take it. When he was shot and came back to work, he hated desk duty; his first day back, when we were leaving, he said that he went stir crazy after six minutes."

"It won't be an easy transition."

"I just hope this doesn't make him shut down on us."

"We don't let him."

"That won't be easy."

"If you're partners with my brother, you have to be just as hard-headed as he is," Will tells her.

"Will that be enough?"

"It has to be." It is quiet for a moment before Will asks, "How are you doing with everything?"

"What do you mean?" Hailey asks.

"You basically lost your partner. There's no way he'll ever be allowed back into the field. You can't tell me that you're okay with that," Will responds.

Hailey sighs, looking back to Jay's sleeping figure in the back seat, "I thought he was dead. He covered me and I thought it killed him. And then when I knew he was still alive; I was afraid he was going to end up paralyzed. If this is the worst thing that comes out of the accident, I can live with it. This won't keep Jay from being active. He's still Jay, he's still here."

"But how do you feel about this? I know you've been being strong for Jay, but he doesn't need to know about this conversation."

"I can process this later; I need to be there for Jay."

"Hailey…"

"I lost my partner, but I didn't lose my best friend. He's here and he's going to be okay," Hailey repeats. "What about you? This can't be easy on you?"

"I'm dealing. I'm just glad I still have my brother," Will answers looking back in the review mirror to see Jay asleep with Kohl's head in his lap.

The rest of the ride is silent, both the doctor and the blonde detective, lost in their own thoughts.

* * *

Normally a seven-hour drive to Ashland, Wisconsin, Will was able to make it in just over six hours since there was barely any traffic because of the late start.

"Hailey, wake up. We're here," Will wakes up the blonde detective.

"What time is it?" Hailey questions when she realizes she fell asleep.

"A little before one o'clock."

"Ugh, sorry I fell asleep," Hailey apologizes.

"Don't worry about it, it's been a long week."

"But still."

"I'm used to long drives on my own, it's fine. Here're the keys, can you wake Jay and I'll get the bags?"

"Do you need help?"

"No. Just get Jay and Kohl."

"Okay," Hailey answers going to the backseat to get Jay and the dog. "Kohl," Hailey calls the dog before placing her hand on Jay's shoulder, putting gentle pressure on it until Jay wakes up.

"What?" Jay asks confused and tired.

Hailey once again uses her thumb to spell 'here' into his shoulder.

Jay grunts before slowly getting out of the car, using Hailey to steady himself. Hailey then puts Kohl's leash on him and leads them both to the door. Jay then goes to the couch and lays down. Before Hailey can even think about looking around for something to write with to communicate with Jay, Will enters the cabin. "We need to put sheets on the beds, but since it's one-thirty, I was thinking we just put blankets on the beds and worry about making them in the morning."

"Sounds good to me," Hailey answers, yawning.

"I'll save the tour for tomorrow, but the bathroom is down the hall on the right. You can take the bedroom to the left of the bathroom," Will instructs her.

"Thanks, Will."

* * *

Hailey is walking out of the bathroom after getting up in the middle of the night when she thinks she hears something from Jay's room. Hailey slowly opens the door, not wanting to startle him if he was awake.

Looking in, using the light from the hallway, Hailey can see Jay tossing and turning– the beginning of a nightmare. Hailey goes over to his bed and gently places a hand on his arm, rubbing it up and down trying to calm him down.

Jay stirs, "Hailey?" He questions.

Hailey nods, moving her hand she asks, " **N-I-G-H-T-M-A-R-E?** "

"Sorry. Did I wake you?"

Hailey shakes her head, giving him the message that she was already up. Jay looks at Hailey and she can tell that he wants to ask her something, but something is stopping him. " **W-H-A-T**?"

"I don't want to bother you."

" **J-A-Y** ," Hailey demands. " **T-E-L-L W-I-L-L**?" Hailey asks, wanting to know if he'd rather talk to Will.

"No. I've bothered him enough. He hasn't slept in a bed since the accident."

Hailey raises an eyebrow.

Jay sighs before looking down, "I don't feel grounded," he mutters.

" **S-T-A-Y**?" Hailey asks, wanting to know if he would rather she stay than get Will.

"I don't want to bother you either."

Hailey stands up before going to the door to close it to a crack to let some light in, before going back to Jay's bed. She gently nudges him, letting him know to move over. Jay moves, giving her room to get on the bed. Hailey then pulls him close, letting Jay rest his head on her shoulder, the same position that she found Jay in when Will would stay with him at Med. She rubs his back until his breathing has even out and she is sure he is asleep.

Holding him close, Hailey thinks about what she told the older Halstead on the way here: How she's lucky that she still has her best friend. Even though there have been times that she wanted to strangle Jay herself, she doesn't know what she would do without him

Eventually, Hailey is able to fall asleep– and it's the most peaceful her sleep has been since the start of this nightmare because Jay is next to her and she knows that he is going to be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in Fanfiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please go over there to read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/4/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ Upstead Update  
> \+ Side Note on ASL and different Sign Languages around the world.  
> \+ Deaf Notes and information on accessibility settings on iPhone.  
> \+ Signing Sunday  
> \+ Questions & Comments Answered
> 
> QUESTION FOR ALL OF YOU:  
> 1) When I first posted as a one-shot, I got a review, but forget what it said exactly, but it basically asked if Jay would end up working at Molly's. What would you like to see Jay doing now that he can't be in the field/be a cop (because we know that he's not meant for a desk)?  
> 2) What are some physical or personality traits that the team has, individually, that would be part of their name sign?


	5. The Cabin I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The trio and Kohl spend their first day at the cabin in northern Wisconsin.

Key:

_ Text _

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

This is the same position that Will finds the two in when he goes to check on Jay in the morning. He quietly shuts the door back to the crack that Hailey had left it when she came into Jay's room through the night, not wanting to wake the blonde detective.

Will looks at the clock to find it's nine in the morning. Later than he would be up if he were working, but still too early after spending a week in the hospital at his brother's bedside and driving over six hours the previous night.

Will decides a cup of coffee is what he needs, so he goes into the kitchen to start a pot. Knowing that Hailey is not a morning person, from all the times he's had to listen to Jay complain, and that Jay should still be sleeping a lot from his head injury, Will makes enough for two cups, that way it will still be warm if one of them does wake up and they can always make more– nothing is worse than cold coffee he shudders.

* * *

"Hey," Hailey greets walking into the kitchen half an hour later.

"Hey, how's Jay?" Will asks looking up from his phone.

"Last I checked, he was still sleeping," Hailey answers. "Is that okay? I know he's usually up pretty early."

"Yeah, that's fine. He's still recovering, sleeping is good for him."

"So, I was doing some more research about learning sign language the other night," Hailey starts.

"What did you find?" Will asks interested.

"Illinois School for the Deaf offers sign language classes for family of deaf students–"

"Jay's not a student though."

"No, but they also offer classes for people who have lost their hearing and for their families."

"Who teaches the classes?"

"Teachers from the school. It depends on what class you're in, but they're either deaf or hard of hearing themselves or they're a CODA."

"A what?"

"CODA, it's an acronym for child of a deaf adult."

"When are the classes?"

"For families it's Tuesdays and Thursdays from six to nine. For Jay, it would be more… intensive. At least, at first."

"What does that mean?" Will asks.

"It means until he's able to master the vocabulary to get by in everyday situations, he would have class Monday to Friday, six to nine. On Thursdays, we would be in the same class as him."

"That seems like a lot. What would he be working on?"

"Mostly elementary level concepts, since he's not there to learn the concepts, but the vocabulary."

"That sounds like a lot. I don't know if he'd go for it."

"You heard him; he doesn't want to be isolated. If he can't communicate with anyone other than with pen and paper or some way of writing it down, he's going to withdraw from us. You see how slow that is to have a conversation. This will give him language back. You heard Dr. Carter, the hearing aids will help with ambient noise, but it won't help him hearing conversations."

"I know."

"Are you willing to do this?"

"Yeah. I wasn't there for him before when he needed me, I'm not leaving him to fend for himself again," Will vows. "When do classes start?"

"New sessions start every six weeks. So, the next session will start in two weeks."

"Why every six weeks?"

"At the end of each session we get evaluated, and if we pass, we can move to the next level of classes."

"How many are there?"

"Six."

"How proficient do we have to be to pass?"

"I don't know, but from what I can tell, the class on Thursday is going to be used as time to see how well we can communicate with Jay. It looks like on our side, not a lot make it pass level II."

"Why not?"

"Unfortunately, not a lot of people learn to sign for their family members."

"That's not going to be Jay's case."

"Yeah, he has you and the unit."

"Speaking of the unit, how are they going to learn?"

"Haven't figured that out yet, but we have time," before either of them can say anymore they hear footsteps coming out from the hallway.

Seeing Jay round the corner to the kitchen, Will waves his greeting and Hailey gives Jay a small smile. Jay nods back at them before reaching for the coffee pot. Seeing this, Will stops Jay before handing him a glass of water. _No coffee_.

"Come on, Will," Jay complains.

 _You can't have coffee while you're recovering_ , Will answers.

"Fine. What are we doing today?"

 _You still need to take it easy_ , Hailey reminds him. _I thought we could watch a movie_. Will nods in agreement with the blonde.

"Seriously? I can't find trouble here."

 _If you relax for the first couple of days, we can go on a hike before we have to go back to Chicago_ , Will offers.

"Fine," Jay answers. Hailey looks to Will and nods.

 _Before we watch a movie_ , Hailey starts. _Will and I want to talk to you about our plan to learn sign language_.

"Okay. What is it?" Jay asks quietly.

_Illinois School for the Deaf offers classes for newly deafened people and their families._

"How does it work?"

_New classes start every six weeks and there are six levels. Will and I would have classes from six to nine on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Your classes would be more intensive- Monday through Friday, six to nine. Thursdays you would be with us and they would evaluate how well we can communicate._

"Why is mine more intensive?"

_Because they want you to learn the whole language. You'd be working on elementary concepts because you're focusing on the vocabulary and not learning the concepts._

"This sounds like a lot. I don't want you to waste this much time on me."

Will takes the whiteboard and marker from Hailey, _We aren't wasting our time if this is what you want to do. This will give you language again. I wasn't here for you before, but I am now. And I know Hailey wants to be here for you too._

"Who teaches the classes?"

 _Teachers from the school_ , Hailey takes over again. _Some are deaf, some are hard of hearing, and others are CODAs– Child of a Deaf Adult._

"Okay. When do the next set of classes start?"

_Two weeks, so a week after we get back to Chicago._

"Okay."

Hailey smiles, _Okay, I'll get us registered later._

 _Why don't you show Hailey around?_ Will suggests.

"Okay," Jay replies to his brother before looking to Hailey to follow him.

* * *

Jay and Hailey walk down the hall, "So you know where the kitchen and bathroom are, right?" Hailey nods. "Okay, then. This is Will's room, we used to share it as kids. The room you're staying in was where my mom would stay when we came."

Hailey places a hand on his shoulder to stop him, " **Your D-A-D?** " she questions.

"Would never come. Said it wasn't worth the drive."

They go past a closet, "This is a closet, we normally keep the extra blankets here if we're staying for a while. My room used to be my grandfather's. This is another bathroom. And there's a fire pit out back and a little enclosure to put tools and stuff in," Jay tells her as they make their way back to the living room.

" **It's C-O-Z-Y** ," she tells him.

"I know it's small, but-"

 _No. I mean it, it's cozy. It's small but homey, I like it_ , she promises.

Jay looks at her, trying to tell if she is lying.

"I promise," she tells him making sure to enunciate each word, so he understands.

* * *

With the talk of ASL classes out of the way and Jay giving Hailey the tour, the three move to the living room so they can watch a movie. Picking up the remote, Hailey goes to the Netflix app and picks the movie _Bon Cop, Bad Cop_. Before she starts the movie, Hailey makes sure to change the caption setting from _off_ to _English [CC]_.

Hailey sees a look of guilt on Jay's face as she changes this setting. _It's half in French, so Will and I will need the captions for most of it anyway_ , Hailey tells him

Will also sees what Hailey told Jay, "Good thinking," he praises, knowing that Jay would think that the captions would be an inconvenience to them.

The opening scene has all three of them laughing when the two cops end up literally ripping the victim's body in half after fighting about jurisdiction.

While the movie does a terrible job of portraying the police, Hailey and Jay find moments quite funny, especially with the opposite personalities of the two cops.

When the movie is over, Hailey turns to the two brothers, _You want to watch another movie?_

"No, I can't sit still any longer. I need to do something," Jay answers. Will just nods, wanting to give Jay control of what they are doing as long as he is relaxing.

 _I brought a deck of cards. We can use them to practice numbers_ , Hailey offers.

"How?" Jay asks.

_We can play Go Fish. That way we would have to sign the number of the card we want._

Jay looks skeptical, but Will takes the marker, _That sounds like good practice. What about the King, Queen, and Jack?_

_We can look up the sign._

"That's a kid's game."

_It's a good way to practice numbers. If we make learning ASL fun, it will be easier to learn._

After a little convincing, the two are able to get Jay to agree to play. The trio plays four rounds with Hailey winning twice and both brothers winning once before they deciding to stop.

 _Want to watch another movie?_ Hailey asks.

"Can we eat first?" Jay asks.

 _I didn't pack much food. Do you want to go to the diner in town for lunch? We can stop and stock up on food before we come back?_ Will answers.

"I guess," Jay answers.

 _What's wrong?_ Hailey questions.

"I just don't know about being around people," Jay mumbles.

Hailey and Will look to each other, _Does this have to do with what happened at Med?_ Hailey asked.

"What happened at Med?" Will wants to know.

" **T-E-L-L him?** " Hailey asks Jay, pointing to Will.

"The doctor at Med," Jay whispers.

" **I can't hear you. T-A-L-K L-O-U-D-E-R** ," Will tells Jay, pointing to himself then making two 'D' hands; the left facing down pointing to his right and the right one pointing straight out coming down to touch the left. Will then points to his ear, shaking his head, the points to Jay. He then fingerspells the second sentence.

"The doctor at Med," Jay repeats louder. "The way he was acting towards me," Jay continues then looking at Hailey for help.

"When Jay was getting released, the doctor didn't address Jay. And actually, there was a nurse that morning that was being pretty ignorant, too."

" _Why didn't you tell me then? I would have taken care of it before._ "

Jay shrugs his shoulders. "It doesn't matter. I didn't think it would do anything."

_It does matter. You matter. How 'bout we get something to eat? I promise I won't let that happen again?_

"I could eat."

Hailey and Will smile; this is progress.

* * *

 _What do you want to do later?_ Hailey asks Jay once the waitress takes their order.

"Can we actually do something?"

Will sighs, knowing his brother is both stubborn and persistent. _If you take it easy today and tomorrow, we can actually do something the day after._

"Really?" Jay asks questionably.

" **Yes** ," Will answers.

Jay shrugs his shoulders. "I don't know, there's not much to do inside."

_We'll figure something out,_

"Sure," Jay replies sarcastically. Before either can think of a response, their food arrives. The three eat their food in silence, not wanting to leave Jay out it they talk.

While their meal is quiet, Will keeps a watchful eye on his brother. Still concerned, about both his physical and mental health.

 _Finished?_ Will questions when he sees Jay playing with his leftover fries.

"Yeah," Jay answers.

_Okay, we can stop at the grocery store on the way back and stock up on food. What do you want to do when we get back to the cabin?_

"I don't know. I'm kinda going crazy doing nothing," Jay answers.

 _We'll figure something out_ , Hailey promises before the trio gets up to leave.

* * *

In the small grocery store, the three go up and down the aisles to make sure they get everything that they need or want, not wanting to make another trip unless necessary since the town is actually pretty far from the cabin.

Going down the milk aisle, Hailey grabs a regular milk for her and Will, but can't find any almond milk for Jay. The brothers find her while she is still looking for almond milk.

"Hey, did you get everything you need?" Will questions

"Yeah, I just can't find almond milk for Jay," she answers.

"It's a small town, I'd be surprised if they did. Jay's just going to have to rough it for the week."

" **No A-L-M-O-N-D M-I-L-K** ," Hailey tells Jay.

"Okay," Jay answers with a yawn.

" **T-I-R-E-D**?" Hailey asks.

"Little. Sorry," Jay answers.

" **A-L-M-O-S-T D-O-N-E** ," Will promises.

They do one more look around, wanting to grab anything that they could have missed. Once done the three make it to the register where they then have to separate their items.

* * *

When they get back to the cabin, Will and Hailey go to the kitchen to put the groceries away, sending Jay to the couch so they can watch another movie once they are done.

This time Jay picks the movie, _Code 8_. They are about halfway through the movie when Jay falls asleep, his head in Hailey's lap and the blonde detective absent-mindedly playing with his short hair.

Will looks over from his spot on the chair to see his brother and Hailey looking a little too comfortable. "You know I saw you in his room this morning," he comments.

"What are you talking about?" Hailey asks playing dumb.

"I went into his room to check on him this morning and saw you in bed with him. You looked pretty close."

"We just slept. When I came out from the bathroom, I heard a noise from his room. He was having a nightmare. I asked if he wanted me to get you but he said he didn't want to bother you, that you hadn't slept in a bed since the accident. He told me that he didn't feel grounded, I asked if he wanted me to stay with him. He said no, but you know how his eyes tell you everything? He was scared, so I stayed."

"Hailey, when are you going to admit that you like my brother in a more than 'just friends' way?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Hailey," Will pointedly say, motioning to their current position.

"His life just got turned upside down. I don't want to be the reason that it changes even more."

"Even if it's a good change?"

"I don't want things to get awkward or to lose the friendship we have."

"He loves you– I can tell. It's like it's a different Jay when he's around you."

"I don't want to tell him by writing. If things are going okay, I'll tell him when he gets a language back and communication is better. Don't tell him."

"I won't," Will holds his hands up in mock surrender. "You know, normally I'd be warning you not to hurt Jay, that he couldn't handle another situation like last time, but I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt him."

"I wouldn't– he's my best friend," Hailey answers, still playing with his hair.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the 21 District, the intelligence unit, minus the two detectives are in the bullpen. "Alright, everyone. Some of you might remember Detective Kenny Rixton, from Narcotics. He's going to be filling in for Upton until she's back," Voight tells the team.

All but Vanessa greet Rixton, happy to see a familiar face. "Rixton, this is Vanessa," Kevin introduces. "She joined after Antonio left."

"Nice to meet you," Vanessa greets.

"You too."

"So, where is Upton?" Ruzek asks.

"Jay's having a hard time adjusting so Will took him out of town for a week and thought it would be good for him if Upton was with them."

"What's going to happen to when they get back? What's going to happen with Jay?" Kim asks.

"We cross that bridge when we come to it," Voight tells them. "Rixton, you're 5021 Baker."

"Sarge?" Ruzek questions. "What's going to happen to Jay?"

"He's on medical for two weeks and after that, I'm still trying to pull some strings for him."

The members of intelligence look to each other, knowing without Voight directly saying, that Jay's chances of coming back to intelligence are slim.

* * *

"When do we have to register for the classes by?" Will asks Hailey as the end credits roll on the screen.

"A week before they start," Hailey answers.

"Do you want me to register for us?" Will asks, motioning with his head to Jay whose own head is still resting in Hailey's lap.

"No, I will once he wakes up," Hailey answers before looking back to the red-head. "Are you sure you can manage the classes? I know your schedule is just as crazy as ours."

"I'll make it work. I saw the statistics," Will tells her. "The ones about family not learning to sign," he clarifies. "I'm not going to let that be Jay," Will announces determined.

"Jay's lucky to have a brother like you," Hailey tells Will.

"Jay said you have two brothers. Would they not do this for you?"

"Maybe before, but I'm not close to them like you and Jay are. We have a difference of opinion– and that's not a conversation that I can have sober."

"Got it."

* * *

"Guys," Kim gets the attention of Adam, Kevin, Vanessa, and even Rixton as they are leaving the bullpen for the day.

"What?" Adam asks.

"We need to figure out what we're going to do about learning sign language."

"What do you mean?"

"I think if we found games to play to incorporate learning to sign, it will be easier to learn," Kim tells them.

"What you talking about Burgress?" Kevin asks.

"If we use games, it won't seem like learning and it might be easier to pick up that way."

"Like Hangman and Scatergories?" Vanessa asks.

"Exactly. We can have a game night once a week," Kim suggests.

"Sound fun," Vanessa replies excitedly, with Kevin and Adam nodding along.

"So how would this work?" Kevin asks curiously.

"I don't know exactly. We can talk with Hailey and Jay when they get back," Kim answers as they walk out of the bullpen.

* * *

"Okay, I got us registered for the first class," Hailey tells Will looking up from her computer.

"Good," Will looks down the hall where Jay disappeared to take a shower. "Honestly, do you think this will work?"

"I think it will as long as we want it to," Hailey answers.

"I just don't know if I can watch Jay close himself off."

"He won't."

"It wouldn't be the first time," Will responds, referring to how Jay closed himself off after Afghanistan.

"Last time he didn't have us. Or the rest of the team."

"How's the rest of the team going to learn?"

"Don't know yet. We'll figure it out later."

Before either one can say another word, they hear the shower turn off, and a few minutes later Jay reappears, hair still wet.

 _Feel better?_ Will questions when Jay comes back to the living room.

"Yeah. Why couldn't I shower before?"

 _You would have messed up the glue_ , Will answers.

Hailey then takes the whiteboard from Will and tells Jay, _I got us registered for the first set of classes._

"Cool, so we can lose the whiteboard soon?"

_That's the goal._

"Is there anything that we need to do before the classes?"

_No. I did find out that even though you have it Monday through Friday, your first class is on Tuesday. And we're in the same room for the first half-hour._

"What if I can't learn?"

_Hey, no 'what if's' you can if you put your mind to it. And it's always easier to learn another language when you already speak more than one— which you do._

"What about you and Will?" Jay asked worriedly.

 _I know Greek. And Will is smart_ , Hailey reassures him.

Will takes the whiteboard from Hailey, having been following the conversation, _We got this Jay_ , he promises. _I'm going to start dinner, want anything specific?_

"No. I'm good with whatever," Jay answers.

Will nods and heads towards the kitchen.

 _He spoils you_ , Hailey comments.

Jay takes the whiteboard from her as he doesn't was Will to hear him, _Only when I'm sick or hurt. I think I scared him._

_You scared all of us._

"Sorry," Jay whispers.

 _I'm just glad you're okay_ , Hailey tells him, placing a hand on his arm.

* * *

Dinner was pretty quiet as writing while eating is not the smoothest action and Will and Hailey didn't want to exclude Jay from any conversation.

After eating the three head back to the living room. "Can we just watch another movie?" Jay asks. "I don't feel like thinking right now."

Hailey nods and hands him the remote to pick a movie out. Will looks over to him and cocks his head to the side while giving a thumbs up, silently asking if he's okay.

"Yeah, just tired," Jay tells him once he notices Will after choosing the movie.

The three take their spot on the couch, Will and Hailey on the ends with Jay in between them.

Will grabs the whiteboard, _Take it easy tomorrow too and see how you're feeling after that. We can go for a hike if you're up to it_ , Will shows him.

"Really?"

" **Yeah** ," Will answers signing the sign for 'yes' at the same time.

That appeases Jay enough that he turns his attention back to the TV. Making it about halfway through before his head starts to drop, leaning onto Hailey's shoulder.

Hailey looks over to Will, "Is he okay?" she questions.

"He's fine. He's still recovering technically and he spent a week in the hospital doing nothing. His body needs to get used to doing things again," Will answers.

Hailey and Will finish the movie before deciding to call it an early night. Will puts his hand on Jay's shoulder, gently squeezing it to wake up his sleeping brother.

"What?" Jay mumbles incoherently.

 _Time for bed_ , he announces.

"Okay," Jay agrees slowly getting up taking the whiteboard with him.

* * *

Once the three of them have gotten ready for bed and are in their own rooms, Hailey digs out something from her bag that she wants to give to Jay before going to bed.

She walks up to his room and opens the door enough that she can reach in a flick the lights.

"Come in," Jay calls. Hailey walks in to find Jay sitting on the edge of the bed. "What's up?" he questions.

 _Here, I got this for you while we were at the store_ , she hands him a white square.

"A nightlight?" he questions, "I'm not afraid of the dark," he tells her confused.

 _I know, but last night you had the door cracked so the hall light would come in. I figured if you can't hear, you would at least want to be able to see if you woke up in the middle of the night_ , she explains.

His face softens, "Thanks, Hailey," he thanks while getting up to plug it in.

_I'll see you in the morning._

"Wait. Can you stay? Just until I fall asleep?" Jay asks quickly while playing with his blankets, afraid of her reaction.

Hailey nods, motioning for him to move over some. Jay does as he is told and Hailey climbs in next to him. Hailey turns off the light next to her and feels Jay move closer to her. Hailey starts to rub his back hoping it will help him fall asleep.

Hailey tells herself that she will only stay until he falls asleep as she waits for his breathing to even out. She closes her eyes and tells herself it is only for a minute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in Fanfiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please go over there to read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/5/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ PSA on why Jay will remain Deaf in this fic  
> \+ Side Note on ASL and BSL  
> \+ Deaf Notes  
> \+ Signing Sunday  
> \+ Questions & Comments Answered
> 
> QUESTION FOR ALL OF YOU:  
> 1) What are some physical or personality traits that the team has, individually, that would be part of their name sign?


	6. The Cabin II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Days 2 through 7 at the cabin.

Key:

_ Text _

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

Jay wakes up the next morning with Hailey now in his arms, he carefully gets up not wanting to wake her up. Jay is cautious when he leaves the room, conscientious that he can't hear any of the noise he may be making as he walks across the room.

Jay walks into the kitchen to find Will, "Why are you up so early?" Jay asks.

 _It's 9:00_ , Will writes. _It's not early_.

"Oh."

Will raises an eyebrow, letting Jay know he wants a better explanation.

"Hailey's still sleeping," Jay tells him, looking back to his room, wanting to make sure he didn't wake her.

_She slept with you again?_

"We just slept."

_I know. When are you going to tell her how you feel?_

"I don't know what you're talking about."

_You're my little brother, I know you're lying._

"I don't need her pity," he tells his brother. "Do you think she's okay. She's not an early bird, but she's normally up by now."

_She's fine. The last week is probably just catching up to her. She was worried about you._

"I guess."

Will jerks his head, indicating that Hailey is coming out of the room. Jay turns around to see Hailey walking up towards them, "Morning," he greets her.

"Morning," she greets back, waving at the same time while making a mental note to look up the sign.

" **What** are **you** guys **doing**?" Hailey asks.

"Not much," Jay answers quickly. "What are we doing today?"

 _One more day of taking it easy and then tomorrow we can do something_ , Will promises.

"Like?" Jay asks, raising an eyebrow.

 _Hiking on that trail you like,_ Will answers.

"Really?"

" **Yeah** ," Will promises.

"Did you guys eat yet?" Hailey asks while gesturing so that Jay knows what's being said too.

" **No,** want coffee?" Will asks, signing 'no' and pointing to the coffee to let Jay be part of the conversation.

"Yes," both detectives answer.

"Not you," Will tells Jay shaking his head. " **Water** or **OJ**."

"Seriously?" Jay asks before turning to Hailey for help. "Hailey," he almost whines.

Hailey sighs, before looking to Will, "It's been a week since he had coffee. He's just going to bug you until you let him have some. How long are you considering him to be recovering?"

"I wanted to see the scans first."

"You're going to deprive him of coffee until we get back to Chicago? That's not good for your sanity. If something were wrong, one of you would have gotten a call, right?"

"Yeah…"

"So, he can have coffee?" Hailey draws out.

"I don't know."

"Will, he is going to drive both of us crazy," Hailey tells the older brother.

"Fine," he agrees looking at Hailey before turning to his brother. "Fine, **one C-U-P** ," he tells his brother.

"Thanks," Jay grins, grabbing a cup.

 _What movie do you want to watch?_ Hailey asks.

"Don't really feel like staying in," Jay answers while grabbing a bagel.

 _We can go hiking tomorrow_ , Will reminds him.

"What about the dock?" Jay questions.

 _What do you plan on doing_? Will questions.

"I just want to get out," Jay tells his brother.

 _Want to work on some signs_? Hailey questions.

"If that gets me out," Jay responds.

"We can work on some signs there," Hailey tells Will. "It's nice out today, there's no point in staying in."

"That sounds okay. I have some cases that I need to consult on, think you can keep him out of trouble?" Will asks as he starts writing on the whiteboard for Jay. _Need to consult on some case; stay out of trouble_.

"We'll be fine," Hailey answers while Jay gives a thumbs up since he has a mouthful of bagel.

* * *

After eating, Hailey goes to her room to grab a book she got while Jay was still in the hospital before they go to the dock.

" **W-H-E-R-E D-O-C-K**?" Hailey asks as they walk out of the cabin.

"Like half a mile walk this way," Jay answers leading her in the direction of the dock.

The walk is mostly silent, Hailey taking in the scenery as she's usually in the city.

 _This is beautiful_ , Hailey tells Jay as they sit on the dock.

"Yeah, my grandfather would always bring Will and me here to fish to give our mom a break."

 _I can't imagine Will fishing_.

"My grandfather would try, but Will would usually refuse and ended up reading," Jay rolls his eyes. "So, what signs are we working on?"

Hailey hands him the book that she brought with them and opens it to chapter two showing greetings and phases and then to chapter three for question words. The two spend the next two and a half hours sitting in the sun and working on the two chapters of the signs and going through the book for anything else that might be important for them to know before they start the classes.

"I think we did enough for one day," Jay looks to Hailey. "My brain is about to explode," he jokes.

_Okay, but I wanted to talk about something before we go back._

"What's up?"

 _So, there are these things called Name Signs in the Deaf Community. They're used so you don't have to spell out someone's name each time_.

"Okay, so how do people get them?"

_A deaf person has to give to someone, and you can't give yourself one–_

"Good thing my name is short," he jokes interrupting her writing.

_So, they're based on a physical characteristic or personality trait, or an interest that they have._

"Physical characteristic?"

" **What are you thinking**?"

"Will's red hair."

 _That's a good example_ , Hailey agrees, glad that he's being open to his new world.

"So, maybe this," Jay drawls out, making a ' _W_ ' with his right hand and touching it to his hair, moving it back.

 _Yeah, if you think that's what it should be. Someone else might have that in the Deaf Community, but I don't see that being a problem with just us_.

"I don't know about everyone else yet, though."

_That's okay. We can just spell out everyone's names for now._

"Okay, can we go back now? I think I'm starting to burn," he tells Hailey causing her to laugh.

 _Okay, Irish_ , Hailey agrees pulling him to his feet.

* * *

"Will," Jay calls entering the cabin.

"Are **you okay**?" Will questions coming into view.

"Yeah. Fine. I want to show you something."

Will nods, letting Jay know he can continue.

"Hailey was telling me about name signs. And I came up with one for you." Will smiles, giving Jay the courage to continue. "It's this," he then shows his brother the same motion he showed Hailey. "It's 'cause of your red hair."

With there still being a communication issue, Will pulls his brother into a hug. Jay tries to squirm out of it, but Will doesn't let him causing Hailey to laugh at the boys' antics.

* * *

The next day, Jay wakes up excited that they are finally going to be doing something active. "Are you guys ready?" Jay asks.

" **You N-E-E-D eat** ," Will tells Jay while throwing a bagel at him.

" **Thanks** ," Jay mumbles after putting the item into the toaster.

 _I take it you're excited_ , Will comments.

" **Yeah** , I can finally do stuff."

 _You went out yesterday with Hailey_ , Will reminds him.

"And we just sat on the dock and went over some signs."

 _Okay, I get it. Eat and we can go_ , Will promises. _Just remember to take it slow. Kohl's old_.

"Fine, but only for Kohl," Jay agrees.

 _You agree for the dog, but if it was for your own good, you'd be fighting us_ , Hailey comments.

"Hailey, come on. Look at him," Jay points towards the senior dog.

 _Just finish your bagel_ , Will tells his brother, while drinking his own coffee.

* * *

"Now can we go?" Jay questions impatiently waiting for his brother and partner.

" **Yes** ," Hailey answers while rolling her eyes at her partner's antics, but secretly happy that he seems to be back to normal for the most part.

" **Ready**?" Will questions the two as he puts on Kohl's leash.

" **Yes** ," both Hailey and Jay answer in unison.

With the three, plus Kohl ready, they head out and make their way to the trail. When they get to the start of the trail, Will stays behind his brother and Hailey with Kohl as they walk. He can hear Jay telling Hailey stories from when they came up to the cabin with their mother and pointing out all the things that they go past. Watching the two, he can tell Hailey is asking his brother questions without using her voice and without signing. It's like they have their own language, just by staring at each other.

Seeing how Hailey is handling communication with Jay, her patience that he now needs with communication, Will knows, no matter what happens between the two of them, the blonde detective is always going to be in his brother's life.

Every so often, he can see Hailey pointing something out to Jay and spelling what it is, making him do the same. The hike is a little harder than he remembers, but he manages to keep up with Jay and Hailey for the most part.

"Hailey," Will calls to the blonde causing her to look back. "We need to stop for a little bit, Kohl's slowing down, he needs water."

"Okay," Hailey answers before grabbing Jay's arm causing him to stop.

" **What**?" he asks.

" **K-O-H-L** needs **water** ," Hailey tells him, spelling Kohl's name and making a 'W' with her left hand, tapping her index finger to her chin a couple of times to make the sign for _water_.

Jay nods in understanding. " **You too** ," Will tells Jay, making a 'Y' with his right hand making an arching motion. Jay rolls his eyes but takes a drink of his water anyway.

"Where does this lead?" Hailey questions.

"There's a field, at the end of it," Will answers while pouring water for Kohl.

Jay walks up to Kohl and scratches Kohl behind his ear. "You having fun?" Jay asks the dog. "Yeah?" he asks when Kohl licks his hand.

"I think this was a good idea. He seems less stressed," Hailey comments as she watches her partner with Will's dog.

"He always loved it up here," Will answers while also watching his brother. "I think if it wasn't for his crazy hours and the distance, he would be up here a lot more."

"Are we good to go?" Jay asks looking up from the old dog.

" **Yeah** ," Will answers gathering the travel dish he put Kohl's water in.

The group continues in the same fashion, Jay and Hailey in the front and Will trailing behind them with Kohl.

It takes another forty-five minutes and two more breaks for Kohl, but the group finally makes it to the field. When they get there, Jay plops his small bag on the ground and uses it as a pillow as he stares at the sky.

" **What are you doing**?" Hailey asks.

"Looking at the clouds, it's… peaceful," he hesitates, trying to find the right word.

* * *

By the time they get back to the cabin, it's dusk. " **What** do you guys **think** about having a **F-I-R-E**?" Will asks the two when they enter the cabin.

"Sounds good," Hailey answers, nodding her head so Jay knows what happening.

"I'll start it," Jay offers, going into the kitchen to look for a lighter. "We still have wood, right?" Jay questions once he finds the item in question.

 _Where it always is_ , Will answers.

Jay nods at Will before going outside to where the fire pit is. "I'm gonna go outside, make sure he doesn't set anything on fire that he shouldn't," Hailey tells the red-head, jokingly.

"Okay, I'm going to hop in the shower real quick, can you take Kohl with you?" Will asks.

"Yeah, no problem," Hailey answers before turning to the dog. "Kohl, let's go outside." Hailey leads Kohl outside to where Jay is.

Hailey spots Jay lighting the fire, " **Hey** ," she gets his attention.

" **Hey, where's Will**?" he asks when notices her.

" **S-H-O-W-E-R**."

"Did he send you out he to babysit me?"

" **No** ," Hailey answers, giving him a look.

"Do you know what's going to happen when we get back? About work?"

" **No, sorry. Maybe V-O-I-G-H-T knows** ," Hailey tells him before grabbing the whiteboard to finish her thoughts, _Don't worry about it right now. We can figure it out when we get back to the city_.

"Okay," Jay mumbles.

Hailey places a hand on his shoulder, _Everything is going to work out_ , she promises.

"I guess," he replies.

"Kohl," Hailey snaps her finger to get his attention. "Get Uncle Jay," she tells him pointing to the brunette. Kohl follows her and goes over to him, resting his head on his knee.

"Hey, Kohl," Jay greets, giving the dog a good head rub.

Will joins them a couple of minutes later to find the two detectives working on their signs.

When the two notice him, they move to make room for Will.

* * *

_What's the plan for today_? Hailey questions the brothers while eating breakfast.

"Fishing," Jay answers. "If you're okay with that," he adds, knowing not everyone likes that.

 _Sounds good to me. I take it Will is going to stay behind_.

"You would be right," Will answers, reading what Hailey asked his brother. "I'll do something with Kohl; I don't want him to get into the hooks," Will tells her.

"Ready?" Jay questions after finishing the last of his coffee.

" **Yeah**."

"Rods are in the shed," Jay tells her, getting up.

"Guess that's my cue," Hailey looks to Will before she gets up to follow him.

Walking in-step with Jay, Hailey finds herself back at the dock they were at just two days prior. Jay hands her a rod and opens the tack box for the bait.

"I didn't know if you'd be okay with fishing," Jay comments.

 _I have two older brothers_ , is her reply.

"That would do it. Do I need to take the fish off the hook for you?" Jay questions, to which Hailey gives him a look and points to the whiteboard where she has her previously written statement. "Okay, okay, I got it," he jokes.

 _Have any good fishing stories_? Hailey questions.

"Did I tell you why Will stopped fishing with our grandfather?" Jay asks.

" **No** ," Hailey asks, raising an eyebrow for a further explanation.

"I think Will was seven or eight and he went to take a fish off his hook, but he got it stuck on this thumb instead."

Hailey gives him a look.

"I know, but then being the genius he is, he got a second hook in his thumb," Jay laughs.

" **How**?" Hailey asks making two 'A' hands and placing them together in front of her chest so her fingers are touching before tilting her left hand forward.

"Because he tried to get the first hook out with a second one, who would have thought he'd end up being a doctor."

" **Be nice** ," Hailey tells Jay, her right-hand palm up fingers together and her left hand in the same shape, but palm down touching her right, sliding it from the heel of her hand to her fingertips.

"It's funny," Jay defends.

Hailey just rolls her eyes, knowing her brothers would be acting the same way if it were them.

* * *

Jay and Hailey spend several hours on the dock fishing, each having made a couple of catches but releasing them back to the water. They only leave around one o'clock when Hailey can hear Jay's stomach growl for lunch.

Walking back to the cabin, the two gather their supplies and make the trim in a comfortable silence.

Entering the cabin, they find Will already in the kitchen making himself a sandwich, he waves a hand over the items on the counter as if telling them to help themselves. Both detectives thank Will before starting on their own sandwiches.

Their lunch is eaten in a comfortable silence, not wanting to write while eating and still not knowing enough signs to have a conversation.

It is when they are putting away the leftovers and cleaning their dishes that Jay gets a notification on his phone. Jay quickly reads the e-mail before turning to Hailey, "The adaptive devices came in early. They were delivered today."

" **That's great** ," she tells him.

"Do you think you could see if Vanessa will pick them up for me after work? So they aren't sitting there for three more days until we get home?"

 _I'll text her, but it shouldn't be a problem_.

"Thanks. I normally would ask Will, but he's here."

 _She sees you as family, it's not a big deal_.

"But still."

Hailey squeezes his shoulder before going to the other room to grab her phone to text the young officer.

 _Hey, Jay's adaptive devices got delivered early. Do you think you can pick them up so they're not sitting there until we get back?_ Hailey sends the text

It takes less than a minute for her to get a response, _Sure, no problem :). Do you want me to take one of the guys with me and set them up for Jay?_

Hailey looks to Jay before answering, _No, that's okay. Jay needs to go at his pace with this and I think if he sets them up with Will that will help._

_Okay. I'll stop at his place on my way home._

_ Thanks. _

_No problem. How's it going with him?_

_Okay. I think this really helped him. He's just really calm here._

_That's good. I'll see you when you guys get back._

_ Yeah. _

_Have fun and tell the guys I said hi._

_Will do_ Hailey sends back ending the conversation. _Vanessa said she would stop at your place after work and she said to tell you hi_ , Hailey shows Jay who gives a thumbs up. "Vanessa said hi," she verbally tells the older brother.

"She seems nice," Will comments.

"She is."

* * *

"NO!" Hailey yells, slapping Jay's back, forgetting that Jay can't hear her. "Will, tell him to stop!" Hailey yells to Will knowing he's in Jay's line of sight.

"Nope," Will answers, popping the 'p', enjoying the show as Jay has Hailey over his shoulder, getting ready to throw her into the water.

"WILLIAM!" Hailey screams as she is thrown into the lake.

Emerging from the water, she spots both brothers laughing at her. Before she can do anything, she is splashed by a wave of water from Jay jumping in next to her. " **J-A-Y!** " Hailey yells when he emerges.

"What?" he asks innocently.

" **You know** ," Hailey answers.

"You were taking too long."

"He's right you know," Will agrees.

"Hailey," Jay calls.

" **Yeah**?"

"Are you coming over to help set up the adaptive devices?"

" **I thought you** and **Will** were **good**?"

"Have you seen this guy trying to set something up?"

" **No** ," Hailey answers while Will splashes him.

"Don't listen to him," Will tells the blonde.

"Hailey, whatever he's telling you, it's lies. I don't want a visit from 51."

" **L-I-A-R** ," Will tells his younger brother.

Not wanting to get stuck in the middle of a Halstead brother argument, she slaps Will in the back of the head and Jay in the arm.

"Hey, I need to feed Kohl," Will tells Hailey as he swims towards the dock.

"Will! Where you going?" Jay questions.

" **K-O-H-L** needs to **eat** ," Will answers.

"We should probably get going too," Jay looks to Hailey.

" **Okay** ," Hailey answers following Jay's lead to the dock.

* * *

"You can have the shower first if you want," Jay tells Hailey as they enter the cabin with Will heading straight to the kitchen to get Kohl his food.

" **Thanks** ," Hailey responds before going into her room to grab her things.

With Hailey taking a shower and Will feeding his dog, Jay decides to look on his phone to go over any e-mails or messages that he needs to take care of. Looking over his notifications, he sees a voice mail. Clicking on the voicemail, he gets a transcript of what was left: Hi Jay, it's Dr. Carter. I'm calling regarding your hearing _ _ _ _ _. They came in so I want to _ _ _ _ appointment to program and talk _ _ _ _ caring for them. I'm assuming you'll get a transcript, but if not I'm _ _ _ _send an e-mail as well.

Even with some of the words coming in as blanks, there was enough of the message for Jay to know what was happening. Looking at the time, Jay sees that it's still a decent time. "Hey, Will?" Jay questions looking at his brother.

" **Yeah**?" Will answers raising his eyebrows to show he is asking Jay to continue.

"I got a voicemail from the audiologist. She said that my hearing aids are in and to contact her. Can you help me?"

 _Yeah, what do you need me to do_?

"If I put the phone on speaker, can you tell me what she's saying?" Jay asks receiving two thumbs up from Will.

Jay hits the redial button and puts the phone on speakerphone, "Hello," comes through the speakers. Will nods to let Jay know that the call went through.

"Hi, Dr. Carter. This is Jay Halstead and Will is writing what you're saying for me. I got your message about making an appointment."

"Yes, your hearing aids came in. You'll need to come in to program them and we can also talk about how to care for them and any other questions you might have," she tells him and Will writes as she talks.

"Okay, that sounds good."

"I have an opening tomorrow morning at eleven?"

"I'm not in Chicago right now. We'll be back in three days."

"Okay, let me check," there's a pause. "I have one three days from now at two in the afternoon. Does that work?"

Jay looks over to Will who nods, "Yes. See you then."

"See you then," she ends the phone call.

 _Are you excited_? Will questions his brother.

"Excited and nervous," Jay decides on.

 _It's going to be okay_.

"I know. Are you sure you can make it?"

 _Yes, I can get someone to cover for me for a little bit_.

"It's just you already took a week off because of me."

_Hey, don't worry about that, okay._

"Yeah."

Finishing their conversation, Will hears the shower stop and Hailey comes out a minute later in clean clothes, her damp hair hanging in loose waves. Will jerks his head towards her as if telling Jay to let her know.

Hailey looks to Jay raising her eyebrow as if silently asking him what's going on.

"Hearing aids came in. I have an appointment in three days to go in and get them programmed."

" **That's great** ," Hailey tells him, smiling.

"Yeah. What if it doesn't help?"

 _Give it a chance. Remember she said, it would only help with ambient sound, but you would benefit from them_ , Will reminds Jay.

"I know," Jay answers before looking over to Hailey who has put a supportive hand on his arm.

 _You want to watch a movie_? Will questions not wanting Jay to get stuck in his head.

"Okay," Jay answers looking at Hailey. "You guys can pick."

 _I'm going to make popcorn. Want some_? Hailey asks.

"Yeah, thanks."

"Will, popcorn?!" Hailey calls on her way to the kitchen.

"I'm good. Thanks though," he responds before turning to Jay, _What about this_? Wil asks Jay, pointing to the Netflix screen _Hardcore Henry_.

"Looks good," Jay answer after reading the description.

Will turns on the movie and Hailey walks back with two bowls of popcorn a few minutes later, handing one to Jay before sitting next to him on the couch. The three of them spend the rest of the night watching movies, Will only taking a couple of breaks to let Kohl out.

* * *

"Hey!" Jay yells at Hailey, moving back to an upright position after floating on his back. "What was that for?" he questions the blonde referring to her splashing him with water when she jumped in from the dock.

" **R-E-V-E-N-G-E** ," Hailey answers smiling.

"You're evil," he deadpans. Hailey raises an eyebrow causing Jay to laugh. "Fine, not evil, but still."

" **Will W-O-R-S-E**?" Hailey questions wanting to know if Will's done worse.

"At times," Jay decides after a moment.

" **What are you thinking**?" Hailey wonders, knowing the look that Jay is giving her.

"What if we fail the classes?" Jay doesn't meet her eyes.

"Jay," she whispers, knowing he can't hear her. She swims closer to him before tugging him towards the dock. Both of them climb out of the lake and take a seat on the dock.

Hailey goes to say something, but Will interrupts before she can, "Did you guys get lost? You were supposed to come back for lunch two hours ago. I put yours in the fridge," he informs the blond while showing Jay the whiteboard with the same message.

"Sorry, lost track of time," Jay answers after reading the message, grabbing his towel he left on the dock.

"Sorry," Hailey also apologizes sheepishly. She then takes the whiteboard, writing her own message to Jay, _This isn't over_.

* * *

_We should finish what we were talking about earlier_ , Hailey hints to Jay as they sit out back waiting for more stars to show up.

"It was nothing, Hailey."

 _It's not nothing, if you're worried about it_.

"Maybe I'm overreacting."

 _You have legitimate concerns_.

"Can we talk about this later? When we get back to the city? It's our last night before we go back to normal life."

_Fine, but we will finish this._

"Thanks," he mumbles before pulling Hailey close to him so they can watch the stars. Hailey takes this as an opportunity to get closer to Jay since Will decided to call an early night since they were leaving in the afternoon.

Hailey nudges Jay and points to a constellation.

* * *

_I can't believe this is our last day here,_ Hailey tells Jay on their way back to the field they went to on the third day.

"I know. I would like to come here more often, but with our schedule it's hard."

 _I never pictured you as a country boy_ , Hailey smiles.

"Only good memories here. Chicago's a different story, don't get me wrong, it's home, but there's something different that I like here."

 _So, since Will isn't here, I think we should finish our conversation from yesterday_.

"It was nothing."

" **No** ," Hailey tells him forcibly. _It's not nothing, talk to me_.

"Learning a new language is hard. It takes a lot of time; time that you and Will don't have, maybe I should just learn how to read lips. Signing won't work if, I'm the only one who knows it."

Hailey looks to Jay, sad that these are the thoughts that have been plaguing Jay's mind, and hugs her friend. _We get through this together. No one left behind_.

"So, I was thinking more about the name sign thing you were telling me about," Jay starts, trying to change the subject.

Hailey raises an eyebrow letting him know she wants him to continue.

"I haven't thought of something for everyone, but I was thinking of this for Voight," he continues, showing her a 'V' on his chin that looks like he's holding an imagery cigarette, "you know, cause of his voice. You said a characteristic or personality trait."

 _His most known characteristic_ , Hailey agrees.

"I just don't know about the others, yet."

 _Take your time. They'll like whatever you come up with_.

"Maybe something with Adam's beard, but that won't make sense if he shaves it."

_Hey, you have time. There's no rush, we can just spell names out for now._

"Yeah," Jay looks at his watch. "We should get going, Will wants to leave by two."

" **Okay** ," Hailey agrees, letting Jay pull her up from her spot on the ground.

* * *

Hailey and Jay make it back to the cabin to find Will outside with Kohl. " **Ready**?" Will asks, looking at the two.

"No," Jay answers, not ready to leave his safe haven.

 _We'll come back for Christmas_ , Will promises.

"Okay," Jay answers, going inside to grab his bags.

"I should get my things too," Hailey looks to Will before following her partner.

"Yeah, I'm going to clean out the fridge," Will informs her. "Leaving in an hour?"

"Sounds good," she agrees.

* * *

An hour later, the three of them are in the car with Kohl on the way back to Chicago. "It's probably going to take closer to seven hours this time, but we should get back by nine," Will tells Hailey who's in the backseat this time.

"Okay. So, set up the equipment tomorrow?" Hailey questions.

"Yeah, I can spend the night at his place," Will answers after he thinks about it for a moment.

"But we both have to work tomorrow, that's not going to work," Hailey remembers.

"Okay, his appointment is at two, so if he gets the L, he won't be home by himself that long and then he can wait in the doctor's lounge until I get off work."

"Does he need a ride?" Hailey asks the older brother.

"He can't drive and we both need to work. He's fine to take the L."

"I'm surprised you're saying that, with how you didn't want him doing much."

"We would have heard by now if something was wrong."

"I can take a late lunch and bring him," Hailey offers.

"If that's okay with Jay, then sure," Will agrees.

"I'll talk with Jay when we get back to Chicago."

Jay looks between the two of them, "Are you guys talking about me?"

Hailey pulls out her phone, _Sorry. We were trying to figure out what to do about you being alone in your place until we get your devices set up tomorrow._

"What do you mean?"

_It's not safe; if something happens and you don't know._

"I'll be fine."

_Yeah, we were thinking that you wouldn't be by yourself too long before your appointment. And after that, you could hang out in the doctor's lounge until Will's off and tomorrow night, we can set your things up._

"I hate hospitals."

_I know, but right now, I don't know what else we can do. At least until your apartment is set up._

"I know."

_Do you need a ride to your appointment?_

"I was going to take the L," Jay looks over to Will who nods when he feels his brother staring at him.

_I can drive you._

"I don't want to bother you."

_You're not bothering me. You would do the same for me._

"Are you sure?"

_100% and I can bring the devices when I pick you up._

"Okay, thanks," Jay whispers and Hailey reaches forward to squeeze his arm.

* * *

"Bye," the brother's wave as Hailey gets out of the car with her bag and goes into her and Vanessa's home. Hailey waves back before disappearing into the house.

"You're back!" Vanessa almost tackles her when she sees her friend. "I missed you. How was it? Did you talk to Jay?"

"Yes, I'm back. I missed you too. It was good. Yes, I talked to Jay, but not about what you think," Hailey answers Vanessa's questions.

"Hailey," Vanessa draws out.

"Now isn't the time. He seems to be adjusting okay for now. I don't want to throw too much on him at once."

"Fine, but you need to soon. Before someone else grabs him."

"I think dating is the last thing on his mind right now."

"That won't stop other girls, have you seen him?" Vanessa questions causing Hailey to laugh.

"Come on, we can watch a movie and catch up," Hailey offers.

"Yeah! Sounds good."

"Oh, before I forget, where did you put Jay's things?"

"Right there," Vanessa answers pointing next to the stairs.

"Thanks, by the way."

"It was no problem."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in FanFiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please go over there to read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/6/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ Explanation on why Jay isn't driving  
> \+ Deaf Notes  
> ++ https://www.verywellhealth.com/using-name-signs-for-personal-names-1048725  
> +Signing Sunday  
> \+ Questions & Comments Answered
> 
> QUESTION FOR ALL OF YOU: What are some physical or personality traits that the team has individually, that would be a part of their name sign?


	7. Programming & Installation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay gets his hearing aids programmed and the trio installs his adaptive devices

Key:

_ Text _

_Writing_

" _Signing Only_ "

" **Signing and Talking** "

"Talking Only"

* * *

"What am I supposed to do all day?" Jay questions his brother as the red-head is getting ready to head to work.

 _Watch TV, look up some more ASL, take Kohl for a walk if you want_ , Will suggests. _And it's not all day, Hailey's going to pick you up at 1:30 for your appointment at 2_.

"Might as well be all day," Jay mumbles. "When can I drive again?"

 _You have another appointment at the end of next week. If the doc signs off on it you can then. Are you going to be good to drive then_?

"What do you mean?" Jay asks, confusion on his face.

 _When we drive, we rely on our hearing just as much as our vision to help us be aware of our surroundings. You're going to be relying on your vision more now. Do you want to go back to driving right away, or do you want to wait until you get more settled without your hearing_?

"I want to get back to normal."

_Okay. You can have your keys back once the doc clears you._

"Just like that? I don't have to make a case to convince you?"

 _I'm going to be worried about you? Yes. But you're my little brother, that's always going to be the case. I trust you_.

"Thanks."

 _I need to go if I want to get to work on time, but I'll be there for your appointment if you want me to be_.

"Are you sure? You already missed a week of work."

_If you want me there, I'll be there._

"Yeah, it's probably going to be a lot of information. I don't want to miss something."

 _Okay, I'll be there. You good with hanging out in the doctors' lounge after, until my shift is over_?

"Yeah, but I can take the L home; I don't want to be in the way."

 _If you want. I trust you, but I would feel better if you weren't home alone until we set up your adaptive devices tonight_.

"Can I decide later?" Jay asks hesitantly. Will nods then motions to the door after pointing to his watch, "Okay, I got it. You need to go. Go save a life," Jay jokes shooing his brother out of his apartment.

Will waves good-bye to Jay and says good-bye to his dog before grabbing his bag and leaving the detective alone with the dog.

"Well, I guess it's just us," Jay looks to the old dog.

* * *

"Hailey, we missed you," Kim greets the blonde detective as she enters into the bullpen.

Hailey laughs as she is wrapped in a hug, "Missed you guys too."

"Hey, where's my hug," Kevin feigns hurt.

"Hey, Kev," Hailey greets while receiving his bear hug. "What'd I miss?"

"Not much. Same old, same old."

"How's Jay?" Kim asks.

"Where's Adam? I'd rather not have to say what's going on more than I need to."

"Adam is right here," the officer in question answers from the stairs hearing his name.

"What's happening with Halstead?" Voight leads Hailey coming out of his office with Kenny.

"Who's-"

"Sorry, this is Kenny Rixton. He was the loan-out detective while you were gone. He was also with us for a little a bit before you came to intelligence," Kevin introduces.

Rixton nods his greeting to Hailey and she does the same.

"What's going on with Jay?" Kim asks concerned about her friend.

"He has an appointment with the audiologist to get his hearing aids programmed today," Hailey starts.

"So, what's that mean for him?"

"We have to wait and see, the audiologist said in the beginning that this would mostly help with ambient sound. The plan is still to learn sign language."

"So, he's not coming back?" Kim looks to Hailey.

"He might be able to work a desk, depends on what the Ivory Tower says."

"What can we do?" Kevin wonders.

"Treat him the same. He's still Jay. He's still our family."

"We were talking while you were gone," Kim tells Hailey.

"About what?"

"How we can learn sign language," Vanessa chips in.

"Kim was saying that if we use games, that might make it easier to learn," Adam thinks back to their last conversation on the subject.

"That could work."

"We were thinking maybe getting together once a week. That way we can learn with each other. Make a game night out of it," Kim tosses out the idea.

"I'll talk with Jay. See what he thinks."

"Now that we have an update on Halstead, let's get back to work," Voight orders.

* * *

" **Ready**?" Hailey asks when Jay opens the door to his apartment for her.

"Yeah," he answers, moving out of the way so she can come in with his packages that Vanessa picked up for him while they were away.

" **N-E-R-V-O-U-S**?" Hailey questions.

"A little."

Hailey just nods, squeezing his shoulder in support.

"We're setting this stuff up tonight, right?"

" **Yep,** then **you** can be **I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T again**."

Jay nods, "We should go."

" **Okay** ," Hailey responds leading the way to her car.

The ride is silent as they still don't know enough sign to be able to have a conversation while they are driving. The journey to Med is quick as they missed the lunch rush. Hailey parks in the ED parking lot so they can grab Will and go to audiology through the ED.

"Is it bad that we don't know how to get anywhere in Med without going through the ED?" Jay looks over to the blonde.

Hailey looks to her partner and shrugs her shoulder while cocking her head to the side, silently answering him.

"Hailey," the blonde detective hears her name being called by a now familiar voice.

" **Hey, Will** ," she greets both speaking and signing to include Jay.

" **Ready**?" Will asks his brother.

" **Yeah**."

"You coming too?" Will looks to Hailey.

"Um…"

"Will, are you coming?"

_Is Hailey coming too?_

"Don't you have to get back to work?" Jay looks to his partner confused.

_It's a paperwork day_.

"If she wants to," Jay answers his brother, then looking over to Hailey.

"Are **you okay W-I-T-H me C-O-M-I-N-G T-O-O**?"

"Yeah. It'll be nice if Will or I miss something," Jay answers. Will feigns hurt while Hailey rolls her eyes at her partner. "Come on," Jay leads the two.

* * *

"How is everything going?" Dr. Carter asks Jay, using the same method as the first two meetings.

"Fine," Jay answers.

"And you chose how you're going to move forward?"

"Yeah. Already signed up for an ASL class that starts next week," Jay replies.

"Okay, we are going to get started. So, on my screen, we have your audiogram for your right and for your left. And on the table are your hearing aids and in between them is a programming loop. Right now, your hearing aids are being programmed wirelessly to deliver what is shown on the screen."

"So, they're programmed? Just like that?" Jay questions.

"Yes, but we're going to make sure that they're working by physically measuring the output of the hearing aids while in your ears," she answers. "The first step is to check your ears to make sure there's no blockage." Dr. Carter then takes a tool and checks both of his ears. Hailey can see that Jay is tense with the audiologist in his personal space, so she places a hand on his back and Jay seems to relax at the familiar touch.

"You are good. The next step is to insert the real-ear probe tube into your ear canal. I'm going to do your right first. I'm going to hang this red loop around your ear and then insert the tube into your ear canal so the black ring is right at your tragus. Now the hearing aid will go in your ear canal while the tube is still in place," Dr. Carter continues while placing the right hearing aid in Jay's ear. "Okay, and now your right ear is ready to do the real-ear measurement. Let's do the left not, so turn around," Dr. Carter tells Jay while making a spinning motion with her finger. She then does the same process with his left ear, only this time the loop hanging on his ear is blue.

Dr. Carter then has Jay face a different computer screen and presses some buttons on her computer. Will, having not studied audiology, has a bare minimum understanding of what is happening, while Hailey is completely lost. They can both, however, see lines moving on both the screen that Jay is facing and Dr. Carter's screen.

After about fifteen more minutes of Dr. Carter doing things on her computer, she informs them, "And done."

"So, what now?" Will questions, out of his element.

"You sound muffled still," Jay looks to his brother.

"But **you** can **hear him**?" Hailey asks Jay.

"His voice is muffled and I can't hear the words."

"Jay, turn around," Dr. Carter instructs the brunette, making a motion to spin around. Jay does as he is told and Dr. Carter drops a textbook on the table. Jay's head turns to see what that was.

"What?"

"Did you hear that?"

"Kind of."

"That was ambient sound. With these new tests with the aids, we got you from borderline severe-to-profound to the lesser end of severe, maybe the higher end of moderate."

"So, now what? Are we done?" Jay looks to Dr. Carter.

"We did the programming, now we're going to cover maintenance and care for the aids," she answers causing Hailey to pay more attention than she was before as well as Will. Dr. Carter grabs a sample pair of hearing aids to use as an example. "First thing we start with is what's right and left."

"Okay."

"You open the battery compartment, like this," she opens the hearing aid, "and you're going to either see red or blue on the inside. Red is right and blue is left."

"Red-right, blue-left," the trio echoes.

"Next, is batteries. You either have rechargeable lithium-ion batteries, or you have zinc air replaceable batteries. Yours is replaceable batteries. Now there are two ways to tell if a battery is good or not, other than your hearing aid dying. The first one is to use a hearing aid battery tester," Dr. carter pulls one out. "Place it on here like this and then the reading will show here. The second way, if you don't have your tester, is to do the _bounce_ test."

"Bounce test?" Will questions.

"Take the battery like this, and drop it," Dr. Carter demonstrates. The battery drops to the desk. "This is a good battery." She does the test again and the battery bounces away from her, "This is a bad battery."

"Putting the battery in, it will only go one way," she shows them. "If it's in wrong, the compartment won't shut," demonstrating the battery in the wrong way."

"How long do the batteries last?" Jay asks.

"And what kind of batteries? Like, do all hearing aids have the same size?" Hailey adds her own question.

"There are four main types of batteries that are used, but all you need to remember is that you need the ones with the blue tab. Now, these batteries have a life of about two weeks once you take the tab off."

"The tab?"

"The batteries are air-activated, so once you take the sticker off and air makes contact, the chemicals are activated. Wait for five minutes after taking the sticker off before putting it in the hearing aid. It's best if you change both batteries at the same time, you should hear some type of tone when the batteries are about to die. When you're not wearing your hearing aids, keep the battery compartment open, it will help with battery life and let moisture leave. And store the extra batteries in a dry place, away from the extreme temperatures, I know that's hard in Chicago, but do your best."

"Is that all for the batteries?" Jay asks.

"Yes, any questions?"

"I don't," Jay answers looking over to Will and Hailey who both shake their heads.

"Okay, the next thing I want to go over with you is how to clean them. Use this tool to clean the earwax out from the molds. The molds can detach from the hearing aid and then can be washed in warm soapy water; just be sure that they are completely dry before you reattach them. You can soak them once a week."

"Okay."

"Wipe the aid off with a cloth, but don't use one that has chemicals or alcohol."

"Sounds easy enough," Jay hesitantly states.

"I know this is a lot, but it will just become habit soon."

"Okay."

"The tubbing here, is clear and flexible now, but it will turn yellow and get harder- less flexible- so it will need to be replaced in six months. You can either make an appointment to get it changed or I can send some spare tubing with you."

"Um…" Jay hesitates, trying to process all the information being thrown at him.

 _What about making the appointment for now and if you want to do it yourself when the time comes, you just come to pick up what you need?_ Will suggest.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

"Okay, we can do that," Dr. Carter responds. "The last thing I want to show you is how to put the aid in and out of your ear."

"Okay."

"There are two prongs on one side and on the other has a handle," she explains while holding her sample one. "You're going to hold the handle and bring it back from behind your ear. Put the prongs in your ears where the holes are. Then you want to push it into place, you might need to pull your ear down some for it to go in right. Then put this part over your ear so it is resting right there. To take it out, just pinch the handle and pull it out. Alright, I want you to try before leaving."

Jay reaches for his right side to pull it out of his ear successfully. "Now put it back in." It takes a moment, but he manages to get it back in. "Alright, it looks like you are good to go. The actual hearing aid has an estimated lifespan of five to six years and you should come in once a year for the mold to see if that needs to be replaced. If you have any questions, feel free to contact the office."

"Thanks," the trio leave after Dr. Carter hands Jay a bag that containing the case for the hearing aids, a cleaning set, battery reader, some pamphlets with information, and two packs of four batteries.

* * *

 _You decide yet?_ Hailey asks.

Jay looks at his watch to see it is now three-thirty, "How long 'til your shift is over?" he looks to Will.

_I still have another two hours. And that's if nothing if major comes up._

"You sure you won't get in trouble if I wait for you here?"

" **It's fine** ," Will reassures.

"Okay," he responds to his brother before looking to Hailey, "thanks for the ride. See you tonight?"

 _Yeah, let me know if you want me to pick up something for dinner_ , Hailey offers before leaving the two brothers to go back to work.

 _Grab me if you need something_ , Will tells Jay in the doctor's lounge before going back to work himself.

Jay makes himself comfortable on the couch and picks up the book that he brought with him.

* * *

"How's Jay?" Maggie asks while Will is looking at a chart at the nurse's station.

"He's doing okay. Been better since we spent time at the cabin."

"He's going to be fine, Will. You're a good brother."

"I don't know what's going to happen with work. Not being a detective is going to destroy him," Will looks to his brother through the window.

"Whatever happens, he's going to be fine as long as he has his brother in his corner."

"Thanks, Maggie," Will mutters.

"Anything for my favorite red-head," she sings causing Will to chuckle as he goes to check on his next patient.

* * *

" **Ready** to get out of here?" Will asks Jay once he looks up.

" **Yeah** ," Jay answers, gathering his things. "What sounds good? Deep dish and beer?" he asks as they make out of the doctor's lounge.

Will is about to answer when they see Stella and Gianna waving to them from the nurse's station as they are filling out the paperwork from their latest patient.

"I thought you were a firefighter?" Will looks to Stella as they walk up to the two girls.

"I am, but I'm also trained as a paramedic," Stella answers. "Brett had a family thing, so I did what I had to do to keep the house sane."

"Are they really that bad?" Mackey looks to Stella.

"Be glad you haven't come across them yet."

"Are you talking about-" Will starts.

"Chout, and Doom and Gloom," Stella interrupts him.

"I'm sure 51 thanks you," Will half-jokes.

"We'll see," Stella laughs before looking to Jay. Stella grabs a piece of paper and pen, _I heard about what happened. How are you doing?_

"Okay, thanks."

_Well, if you're looking for something to do, Molly's can always use another bartender. We're still short since Gabby left and then Otis._

"How would that work? I can't hear any orders."

_We will figure it out._

"Can I think about it?"

 _Sure, just let me know. The offer is standing_.

"Thanks, Stella."

 _No problem, we should get back to work, but just text me when you decide. Hailey has my number from that one case_ , Stella tells him just before her radio goes off. "That's us," she tells them, throwing her thumb over her shoulder to try to keep Jay in the loop.

"So, dinner?" Jay asks on their way to the car.

 _You can't have beer_ , Will answers once in the car. _Mexican_?

"Greek?"

" _Greek"?_ Will looks to his brother. _Because of Hailey?_ he teases.

"Because Greek is good, and Hailey helped a lot this past week."

"Fine," Will surrenders, jokingly raises his hands in surrender. _You got a take-out menu at your place?_

"Yeah," Jay answers as Will starts the car.

Once again, the ride is silent, the only sound in the car is the brothers' breathing and the sound of the city passing by.

* * *

"Here's the menu," Jay hands Will the piece of paper out for his brother to look at.

" **Thanks**."

"Is there a game on tonight?" Jay looks to Will.

 _Check the guide_ , Will rolls his eyes, _what are you getting_?

"My usual," Jay answers while petting Kohl.

_Smartass. I don't suppose you know what Hailey is going to get?_

"I'll check with her, but it's probably what she always gets," Jay answers, looking to his phone.

"Order in half an hour? By the time it gets delivered she should be here," Jay asks his brother, handing him his card and an index card with his and Hailey's orders."

"Sure," Will gives his brother a thumbs up. _How do you think about this afternoon_?

"It was okay. Kind of a lot to take in."

_Are they working like you thought?_

"Yeah, I can't hear like normal, but I can tell if a door is shutting."

_We'll get through this together. You're not alone._

"I know. Thanks."

 _I'm going to order now_.

"Okay."

* * *

 _Someone is at the door_ , Will tells Jay before getting up.

"Okay."

Will opens the door to find the blonde detective with bags of food, "I ran into the delivery guy on my way up," she explains. " **Hey, Jay** ," she greets, attempting not to drop anything as she signs.

"Hey," Jay responds. "Food then setting everything up?" he asks the other two.

" **Yeah** ," they both answer at the same time.

The three gather in Jay's small kitchen to eat their dinner. Once again silent because of their lack of signs.

"Okay, what are we doing?" Jay asks looking at the instructions.

 _Do the alarm clock first_ , Hailey tells him. _That's the easiest_.

Jay nods and grabs the clock and goes into his bedroom. He places the clock on his nightstand and then plugs it into both the outlet and the attaching vibration pad. Jay then places the vibration pad between his mattress and box spring. The last thing he does is set the alarm then fix the settings so that both the vibrations and loud sound will go off as the lights were a given.

"Okay, I set up the alarm clock," Jay announces walking back to the living room where his brother and Hailey are.

 _Okay_ , Will looks to his brother. _The base is going to be out here and then the extension ones will be in your room and the bathroom_.

"Sounds good. You figure out how to do that yet."

 _Working on it. Where's your normal fire alarm_?

"There," Jay points to the smoke detector on the ceiling of his hall going to his bedroom.

_What about the carbon monoxide alarm?_

"Over there," he points to about the doorframe of his bedroom.

Will hands Jay a small device, _Attach that to the carbon monoxide alarm_ , he tells his brother. _I'll get the fire alarm_.

"What do you want me to do?" Hailey questions.

"Start syncing the receivers," Will answers handing her the directions.

The brothers leave Hailey to sync the base receiver to the two extra ones while they attach the transmitters to the alarms. "Is this right?" Jay asks looking at his work.

Will looks to Jay before looking to Hailey, nodding his head in that direction. "Hailey," Jay calls. "Did I set it up right?" he asks walking over to the blonde.

_Give me a second then we can test them._

"Okay."

"Hailey," Will calls. "Are you ready?" Will questions five minutes after he sent his brother to the blonde.

"Almost, does this mean it's still syncing?" Hailey asks motioning to the still blinking light.

"What are you talking about?" Will looks to her after looking at the now solid light.

"It was just blinking. I think it's done now."

 _Hit the test buttons to make the alarms go off_ , Will orders his younger brother.

Jay nods and goes over to the alarms, "I'm going to test the fire alarm first," Jay calls to Hailey and Will. The high-pitched alarm starts going off, causing Will and Hailey to flinch, but Jay makes no reaction to the sound. A second after the auditory alarm, a red flashing from where Hailey and Will are catches his attention.

"It works," Will announces giving Jay two thumbs up to convey the message.

Jay lets go of the button on the fire alarm and goes over to the carbon monoxide one and does the same thing. This time instead of a red flashing light, it is a blue one.

"Two down, one to go," Hailey smiles.

"Okay, it looks like the doorbell has a wireless connection to the receiver," Will mumbles to himself as he looks at the box.

Will gets up and goes outside of Jay's apartment to set up the bell while Jay is reading how to set up the receiver. "Will try it," Jay yells to his brother once he figures out his end.

"Hailey, tell Jay I have one more screw," Will yells back to Hailey for her to relay to Jay.

After finishing the final screw, Will yells, "Now."

A second after he yells, the receiver starts flashing, indicating that someone is pressing the newly installed doorbell.

"It works," Jay yells to his brother.

 _Great, now we just need to set up the receivers_ , Will answers.

"Yeah, which one is the base?" Jay questions.

"This," Will answers tapping the one he's talking about.

"Okay. I was thinking right there?" Jay points to where he's talking about. "It should be visible from everywhere but my room and the bathroom."

 _Okay, I'm going to grab a chair then get it mounted to the wall_ , Will answers.

"Okay, I'll take this one and hook it up in my room," Jay responds.

It takes another twenty minutes to get the three receivers set up in their designated place, but once they are done, Hailey and Will both feel better about Jay being on his own and Jay feels like he is gaining his independence back.

 _I'm going to get going_ , Hailey tells Jay. _I'll check in with you tomorrow. Text me if you need anything_.

"Thanks, Hailey."

"Yeah, thanks Hailey," Will repeats before she leaves Jay's apartment, waving to the two brothers.

 _Are you going to be okay on your own_?

"Yeah."

 _Okay. Text me if you need anything_ , Will reminds him before hugging his brother good-bye and gathering his things and dog before leaving.

Once Will shuts the door behind him, Jay makes sure it's locked, knowing that this is the start of his new normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note in FanFiction website. It is more characters than allowed here. Please go over there to read them.
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13686097/7/Silence-is-a-Strange-Sound
> 
> https://twitter.com/otter_love_asl/status/1365005425993781250?s=21
> 
> Includes:  
> \+ Twitter thread info.  
> \+ Deaf World Info.  
> \+ Signing Sunday  
> \+ Questions & Comments Answered
> 
> QUESTION FOR YOU ALL:
> 
> 1) Hey guys, what's a physical characteristic or a personality trait that Jay has? Like something that someone who spends time with him [in his ASL Class] but isn't close like the intelligence unit would notice? I'm trying to figure out what someone would give to Jay as a Name Sign. Ex: Will's name sign is close to the sign for hair, but a "W" handshape and it represents his red hair.


End file.
